How to live with the shame of not having had a life?

[ms spock]

Thanks @biaaw677 I will get it a whirl. I hope I can do it.

 

[ms spock]

I am starting to do this a bit better.

 

[biaaw677]

I am starting to do this a bit better.

Really pleased for you. Right now I'm not in such a good place with my life, so I will leave it there.

 

[ms spock]

So this is a difficult thing, despite this I am doing better at it.

 

[EveHarrington]

I haven’t read the whole thread...

What is the one thing that has helped you deal with the shame the most?

 

[frogthroat]

I think so many people who get stuck in trauma go through this regardless of age. I"m 30 and I feel like I already wasted my entire life but I know this is just negative talk and catastrophizing. In my twenties I felt terrible about not being able to handle the pressure of college and not knowing why I felt like I was weak compared to others my age but you can't base all your worth on your education, career or "what you've done." Maybe you weren't ready yet. In the end, it's the quality of your life that matters and sometimes having an exceptional life is more unconventional. It really depends on what you personally value the most.

 

[ms spock]

I haven’t read the whole thread...

What is the one thing that has helped you deal with the shame the most?

I don't really know...

I now know I need to reassure myself, so that helps a bit. I say I have done the best that I could do. Or I say you worked really hard. Or it has been really hard for you.

 

[EveHarrington]

I now know I need to reassure myself, so that helps a bit. I say I have done the best that I could do. Or I say you worked really hard. Or it has been really hard for you.

Thank you. This helps!

 

[ms spock]

I now know I need to reassure myself, so that helps a bit. I say I have done the best that I could do. Or I say you worked really hard. Or it has been really hard for you.

I have been doing this a bit and it has been helping me not go into paralysis.