General How Well Do You Sleep, As A Supporter

[amethist]

I have seen the thread about how sufferer's struggle to sleep properly. So I thought it would be a good idea to share our own sleep issues and how we manage them.

I myself used to sleep through anything, thunder storms, loud noises inside or our, even a bomb going off would not wake me.

But now. !!!!

Since hubby's accident this has gradually got worse, but when he was drinking 24/7 I hardly slept at all, and held a full time management position. I have no idea how I did that, as there is no way I could do it now.

I wake up to all sorts of things, heavy rain, dogs barking, hubby snoring, twitching, jumping and him shouting out, which he never used to do.

I even have my own issues that either keep me awake or wake me up now, which I never used to. My head running riot, cramps, and muscle spasms. not forgetting the night sweats of menopause.

I use essential oils 3 or 4 times a week now, using a variety of them, so I dont get used to just one and it not work. I use one of the following which help a lot.

Ylang Ylang, Geranium, Rose, Palma Rosa, Marjoram, but not Lavender as it is way to harsh for me.

So these along with a low dose anti-depressant with a sedative effect I do manage to get at least 3 good nights sleep a week, though last night was not one of them. :rolleyes:

 

[Ruby Mayfly]

Hi Amethist,

I'm a brand new member here and up until now I just thought that my poor sleep habits were due to laziness on my part to try and set a decent pattern.

Since my injury my sleep has been erratic - I would go through periods of severe insomnia and then stages where I slept about 14 hours of the day! Before I was put on oxy to help with pain I would self-medicate through heavy alcohol consumption just to knock me out so that I could get some hours of undisturbed sleep, and it also helped numb the physical pain I was contantly in. On the Morphine and other drugs I was zonked out and slept all the time.

I'm off the heavy stuff now and don't drink nearly as much, but I am costantly fatigued. I struggle to concentrate and will often nap for hours at a time - sometimes this effects how I sleep at night and sometimes it doesn't. I guess it's what my body needs sometimes. The worse aspect for me is the nightmares, which are often violent and deeply disturbing. It usually involves the death or injury of myself or someone I love and I usually wake up more exhausted than when I went to bed because of it!

I have found meditation helps, and sometimes classical music on my Ipod at night helps. Other than that I'm still trying to sort it out without drug intervention.

 

[amethist]

Thanks for your input Ruby, though this thread is for how "Supporters" sleep, not sufferers.

You can read and post about "Sufferers" sleep at the link below.

[DLMURL]https://www.ptsdforum.org/c/forums/sleep-nightmares.25/[/DLMURL]

Amethist

 

[wife of]

Hubs has been home on a weeks hospital leave and since the change in meds is sleeping luke a baby. So the last three nights I have had the best sleep in over twenty years..

Although last night I did have to retreat to the spare room as he literaly ended up lying half over me and I could not rouse him enough to move.........nice one mitazipine...

 

[Tifanee]

When he is home, I sleep like I have a newborn baby in the house. I wake up to every moan, groan, panic sound, gasping, and sounds of him having a nightmare. I can put my hand on his chest and it settles him into sleep, then I can sleep. I need to find a way to velcro my hand to his shirt so I can sleep undisturbed all night :)!

When he is out of town, I sleep soundly and don't wake up until the alarms sounds. Is it wrong to want them to leave so you can sleep :sneaky:?

 

[ProudWife99]

I think I can count on both hands the number of nights I've had a "good" nights sleep since the day he left for Iraq. While he was there I was a disaster and up half the night staring at my phone willing it to ring. When he came home he had nightmares so often I rarely stayed asleep longer than an hour at a time.

As he's been released from PET he sleeps much better. He takes a sleeping pill if feeling anxious, but hates to do so as he's afraid he'll be unable to protect me if something happens at night. As he continues to sleep better I'm hoping they'll begin to try to treat the TBI, as they (the VA) said it would be impossible if he was tired from the nightmares.

It never ends, does it? :cautious:

 

[KP the nut]

I know this is supporters but I just wanted to say that my beloved H sleeps in the spare room, especially during the week. He needs his sleep especially with the amount of driving he has to do.

As a sufferer I don't have a problem with this, it is what he needs to do to sleep. We still love one another very much, even after 32 years and all that has been thrown at us.

Sorry for butting in.

 

[amethist]

I like the fact that you can post for your Husband KP, it shows you know how sleep is important to him.

 

[Toria]

Sleep? Oh I love sleep... oh I miss sleep!!!!

I'm the sort of person who can sleep for England and would have no qualms about sleeping in all morning if I could :roflmao:

Husband can drop off to sleep quite quickly but has very disturbed sleep - and I can so identify with the newborn baby analogy, as soon as he stirs I am awake. Like Amethist I used to sleep like a log - I've been known to sleep through thunderstorms and even a skip being dropped in the road outside our house!!!

The other problem I have is his inability to lie in any more. He goes from asleep to awake in a nano second and seems to expect me to do the same - which having spent 10 years in the same bed together he KNOWS is not me!!! He'll sit up and start trying to have a conversation and I'm still trying to stay asleep. An example of last weekend's morning conversation:

Him - what are we doing today?
Me - erm, what is the weather like?
Him - I'll ask you the question again shall I?
Me... *heads back under the quilt as there's obviously not going to any sweetness and light today*

I think I've started to worry about him walking up which adds to the vicious circle of staying awake worrying, worrying because you can't sleep etc etc...

:sleep:

 

[BigBear]

You've got to remember that Angel's and my first 13'ish years were undiagnosed. Add to that, until a few months ago, I didn't recognize that I had married 5 women and not just 1 (still getting used to that).

Way back when, she was the first woman who took care of me. That of course doomed her to marry me. I'd destroy heaven and earth to make her want to stay with me (I'm not actually capable of holding her against her will). I say this because it's what kept us together through the psychic trauma of adapting to her needs (or rather her 5 sets of needs). It was vastly confusing.

During our second and third year, I had massive insomnia. I slept about 3 - 4 nights a week and then only for a few hours. I mark it up to the worries about our relationship. Add to that a new and very different job (a consultant on the road 5 days). Add to that, a new baby or 2. Add to that huge financial dept (my fault).

As I got used to the uncertainty of life, it got better. Toward year 5 I was having only 2 or 3 periods of insomnia a year and those limited to 2 weeks or less.

About year 8 I acquired a demonic and sadistic manager. Things went all to hell again. Finally about year 10, the doctor put me on a low dose of SSRI's. Since then, I have a bad night every once in a while, but nothing extended.

So, now to the more practical side of it. I was a deep sleeper and a terrible snorer. Since I've become diabetic and have a fairly bad case of neuropathy, I have uncontrollable twitching (sometimes) at night. Most of the time we have to sleep in separate rooms. I think that makes her terribly unhappy, but I don't know what else to do...

I guess you'd have to say that I can blame very little of this on PTSD, based on the picture I've just painted...

Bear

 

[Tabitha]

Sleep. Oh how I miss it!

Since N stays up for days at a time and has left more than one time in the middle of the night sleep is non existant for me unless she's sleeping too. I'm always so worried that I'll wake up to an empty house and her not leaving a note or anything again. I know I can attribute this to my abandonment issues but they were NEVER this bad until her "running away" episodes.

I can't even sleep when I take benedryl anymore. My doc gave me a new anti depressant to try and she said it may make me sleepy the first few nights I take it so I'm hoping that will help.

 

[PTSDMama]

C has had such sleep issues over the years, so now that we've figured out how to help his sleep, both J and mine's sleep is horrible. The cat meowing, running, pushing open our door wakes us up. I used to be able to get back to sleep after being disturbed, but now I just lay awake thinking C is going to get up.

I use Rescue Sleep, which helps tremendously, when I'm not on call. If I'm on call, forget it and then I'm up quite a bit.