How Would You Explain Dissociation And Ptsd To A Friend?

[Changing4Best]

I have a new friend and I have been dissociating quite a lot lately, since before I met him and also after. He wants to be my boyfriend. I want to explain a bit about what happens to me, what it is like to be PTSD, but I don't know where to begin. I have thought of saying that sometimes I am not myself. The longest I have ever been dissociated was for 8 days. This happened to me when I was in my 30s and I am in my 60s now. There were many years when I was virtually symptom free, but it's happening again now. How have you explained this to friends and loved ones?

 

[Intrepid]

You could say that the way you perceive time (or people, your feelings, your body, or whatever way you dissociate) changes due to the triggering of some past trauma.

You could also tell your friend how long it usually takes to recover. I was like you. I have had huge chunks of my life where dissociation and flashbacks were a constant problem. But now I recover quickly: usually minutes or hours, or three days at the most.

In your description don’t include anything that is blaming or that could require your friend to make compromises. Just the basic facts.

 

[shimmerz]

I teach my friends to notice physically what is going on first....then they can make their own judgements as to 'what is happening'. I point out that when I have a far away (non-focused) look to my eyes then I have lost track of time and space and most people know it. I also walk into walls, drop things, have coughing attacks when I am affected or changing 'states'. I teach them about this and they can easily clue into the fact that something is happening with me.

I explain at the time that they notice, what is going on in my head. That way I am not overwhelming them with information. If they are not the type that notices that kind of stuff, it is most likely in my best interests not to hang out with them.... this is just my view and my situation.

 

[katz]

I used to do that also. I would feel it coming and then just point to my head, then give them the "one minute" signal. They would just keep an eye on me, so I didn't hurt myself. Then when it was over, the evening would just go on without any other interruption. (I had to do it this way because the first thing to go was my ability to speak.) So, once everyone knew my "signal" everyone was ok with it.