- Post starter
- #49
Multitudes
Silver Member
I've given some thought to this - I'm aware that, neurology aside, the main difference between myself and the majority is that I've never had the normal experience of peer groups, friends, relationships, only a solitary life up until the last three years since I discovered Aspergers and a 'Tribe' of, erm.. similarly diverse people I could relate to.
It occurs to me that we are ruled by three basic instincts, Self Preservation, Sexual Instinct, Social Instinct.
More detail on that here:
https://www.learning-mind.com/basic-instincts-dominant/
Neglect any one of these and you suffer physical/emotional pain - think about going without food or water, or years of solitary confinement.. a lifetime without intimacy (in all its forms) may seem more trivial, but I think that's because societal taboos get in the way, rather than it actually being any less of a survival necessity.
I am only able to fulfill one survival instinct, Self Preservation, hence the very real emotional pain of Aspergers (or any neurological/physical difference). This relationship really has been a 'magic pill' that, in its brief, active time, almost washed away pain, shame, self-blame.. it felt wonderful.
Experience tells me that another relationship is unlikely (certainly not for lack of trying), so I have tended to escape to remote locales as I find a restful serenity in being as far from Humanity as possible - no easy task in the UK.
Still, who knows what the future holds.
