I could do with some advice - Constantly having to explain or defend myself, stress amping up symptoms.

[WinnieThePoohChris]

So I have suffered a lot in childhood and adult life. There's a lot. I will write one day but not sure where to start.

One of things is my mother unable to accept my brothers can do anything wrong.

One of my brothers committed a crime, pinned the blame on me and ruined a lot of my life. He was eventually convicted but he doesn't admit what he did to me. He has been diagnosed with various conditions. Another brother self treating ptsd with alcohol believed him and attacked me for it. I was attacked by others due to it too.

I stated these facts to defend myself and treat physical injuries. Now my mum uses them to push for changes to care.

I still get harassed for my brothers actions, on top of that my mum is phoning people and changing the narrative. I have requested medical services to not listen but she has a way about her.

This is causing daily disturbances with one person or another. Constantly having to explain or defend myself. The stress of it all is amping up symptoms and despite stating my preferences and intentions is solving nothing. Any advice on what to do?

In the UK, through the NHS, I have tried to get an advocate to represent me but they dont do them where I live.

 

[FMCA]

I don’t know but I wonder if the adult social work teams based in your local authority / council could offer or point the direction as to where to get an advocate. They should know how to get one

 

[WinnieThePoohChris]

That's a good idea thank you.

I have contacted them about something else so will ask about that when I see them.

 

[Movingforward10]

Are you an adult? I’m confused why your mum would be involved with your medical appointments, unless I am misunderstanding.

Is there a way of moving away from the people who believe your mother and brother’s version?

 

[WinnieThePoohChris]

Oh yeah I'm in my 40s. I have the same confusion. They dont even believe her, seems she spreads so much doubt, confusion, and concern they have a duty to keep checking on me.

I dont fully understand it myself, seems to have died down last two days after I made a complaint. There is a history of her doing it with my doctor, just moved into different services.

Wish I could move, not in a place to at the moment.

 

[Midnightmoon]

That sounds like such an exhausting situation to be in.

In the UK, through the NHS, I have tried to get an advocate to represent me but they dont do them where I live.

Most advocacy services have moved to charity provision now if it's not statutory services. Don't know if you've exhausted these options already but just incase, services like POhWER, Cloverleaf and voiceability all offer community advocacy services in England, it's just a bit of a postcode lottery as go if they offer it where you are, but might be worth a looksy.

Health services, you can raise a concern via PALS to your local trust to say about your Mum's persistent invasion on your care.... They can make a flag on your health record that when she persistently does this they follow X care plan instead of jumping the gun straight to concern to welfare. Seconding social care too, they always have a duty adult SW who could give some basic advice over the phone and refer for further help if needed

 

[WinnieThePoohChris]

Oh that's helpful thank you!

I have tried some of them and had no luck, my postcode seems to have nothing.

I did not know PALS could do that though, that's exactly what I have been trying to sort out. I will do that this week!