I'm avoiding the 'like' button, seems silly to like other's genuine hardships, gee! Do not have common expereince to add, I was the art major 30 years ago when even THEN everyone knew that was just insane. Many, many blonds in the art department, everyone else was smoking pot.
Western Sky, yes, think the only thing I will say to you is to please try to look at yourself from 'outside' eyes, perhaps. The hugest things you have for pluses would be your age, my goodness, your obvious support systems and the existance of degress ( any kind ) at all. It sounds to me as if the PTSD shame is ONE of the things schlucking up progress, stopping your flow chart when the 'next' option comes up at one point, if that makes sense. Yes, others helped you get where you are but for you to interpret their help as sacrifice, and take on a perspective of ownership thereby is going to bind you terrible. Difference between that and flat gratitude, you know? You very much are not one of those 'Butbutbut ' people ( no one here is, do not mean to imply that ) who loves to shoot down all and every suggestion, it sounds like you're awfully bright, energetic, motivated and success oriented. Also hurt and terribly disapointed.
On the other hand I'd have to say 'life' rarely looks like we thought it would, ask any, single person on this side of 50. As crushed as I've been, and was at 25, ( or 30 ), can honestly say do not think I'd go back and change much since I LIKE where it all took me. Too simplistic, and easy for me to say without the Masters, I realize yet. Still a pretty valid statement.
I just didn't wish to see you perhaps allow your sense of shame ( PTSD induced, generally 100% of the time ) to stop one of the 'flow chart' progressions, in your problem solving equation. Do take care.