I Have Watched For Months - Today I Need To Talk

[FlameTachiku]

xmaxinex,

Welcome to the forum. I wanted to respond to your intro...but it is hard, but it is nice to meet you.

I have also lost a child. I am soooo sorry for your loss-

My sons needs kept me going for a long time, with his many needs. Hours of appointments, avocating for his wellbeing. Days into nights into days of doing. So little sleep, how could it have been done.

Time has past. I did have done well for my son. Now there is time for me to learn to survive. I believe a huge gift to my son will be for me to learn to live well.

Our children need an example, to demonstrate we can survive lifes punches, feel the pain, express heartbreak, make mistakes, show weakness, and move on. Move on and show them with hope and moving forward things do get better. The pain lessens. We go through the pain and it is ok.

This is not an easy journey but a worthwhile journey when we love our child, parents, brothers and sisters, cousins, and anyone else we are able to allow in.

My challenge is it is easy to love those I was close to before tragedy, but almost impossible to develop any relationship with someone who comes after. I wanted to share a bit more of my story--with hope that it helps and that you do not feel alone, in your journey.

Again, welcome-it nice to have you here.

Tachiku

 

[goingonhope]

Now there is time for me to learn to survive. I believe a huge gift to my son will be for me to learn to live well.

Hello again Tachiku, would like to ask what you're learning new and making yourself willing to apply, now that there is time for you. What are some of your present goals, priorities and dreams which will reflect you living well?

Just, happen to be thinking of you and thought that you, me and nearly everyone else here on the board, whom are truly interested in healing, learning and living, ...well perhaps we could create our own positive outlines, even share them if we'd like, as well as, receive supportive reminders to focus upon and hold in balance all that is good and positive in us, our lives and our short and/or long-term goals for our futures.

It's possible that we can help ourselves and each other through our acknowleding for ourselves what exactly does living well look like to each and then through sharing such with others.

Tachiku, I've found your post personally motivating and inspiring, so if I can be somewhat motivating as well in return, I'm glad to be.

Also, really wanted to stop by here to say Hello again to you.

Tachiku, Take Care.


Hope

 

[UmightKnowMe]

Wow....more mothers with children on the spectrum. More people who understand me and my life! Really understand! This is almost too good. My kids are what I lived for for so many years. Finally now I am at the point where I am ready to start learning to live for ME. I have been in therapy forever and learned lots of skills but most weeks it is just processing what went on and strategy for the next one. Now I can have the luxury to do the real work. And work it is. But looking at my son and how far he has come....and how difficult it has been for him...he is MY inspiration!

 

[FlameTachiku]

Hi:smile:

Goingonhope I like your ideas. It would be challenging for me because goal making is a seriously difficult thing to do. It imply's future, I guess, or what? Long term goals are something I have lived without. I am very interested on your take however!

I would love to learn and change but my future is like a hole of darkness. Not so inspireing huh. My longest goal setting to the future was five years ORDERED by the court. But once I completed it in detail (written goals and how they will be achieved) I followed it, and now have a good career. Reality is I did not have a plan B and I followed what was written. Pie in the sky but the rest (another way) was empty. I have a lot of empty. Holes. Which is one reason why I find it difficult to start new friendships. I have so many "holes" that it makes a proposal like you introduce sound overwhelming (but good).

I do have a tool box of ways of copeing with my behaviors, reactions, responses, fears, it certianly helps me present to the world as acceptable.

Umightknowme, I love how you are inspired by your children, where they have been and how far they have come.

If they can We Can.

Flame :occasion: