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i just want to drink until i don't wake up

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@LostLarry - can you say a bit more?

Perhaps try a crisis line in your region? (Remember this is an international forum and we can't offer crisis support), or if you're unsafe head to your nearest ED.
 
why is it so hard to get help. i know i don't mean shit to anyone, i feel like i don't exit. and should not be here
 
I cannot more highly recommend 7 Cups of Tea.


why is it so hard to get help
In my own experience? The 2 main reasons are
- Not knowing where to look
- Not knowing what one wants

Hopefully, even if 7cups doesn’t turn out to be your jam, it will at least move you closer to finding the resources you need. Here at MyPTSD we’re simply not set up to do crisis support, nor real time connection (live chat, & similar), nor IRL interventions & assistance. That doesn’t mean that we’re not still a resource for you, but resources are almost never equipped to do everything. A hardware store may have some bananas, or a hotdog stand. And grocery store may sell a few batteries and screws… but if what I need are building supplies, or food for the week? Knowing which resource to call on for what I want? Solves a whole lotta problems. If I’m off to food? That doesn’t meant I can’t also swing by the hardwares store for a cordless drill. Using one resource doesn’t bar me from using any other resource.

So that’s one notch on the “where to look” problem… How well do you know what you want from help?
 
i'm sorry, i had a hard time the last few days.
Nothing to apologize for. In fact, I think you can be proud of yourself for reaching out. The times we are most in need of help often turn out to be the times that asking for help, or telling anyone how you feel...that can start to seem impossible to do. I'm glad it sounds like you're a bit on the other side of it, now.
 
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