I Was Suspended From Work Today.

[Notsowild]

Well I knew it might happen. I was suspended without pay from work today. Anyone that has been reading my threads knew I was having trouble with my new boss. She gets in my face, is always critical and yells at us.

I talked to our HR dept last week and they they said I should tell her about my PTSD . Then I talked to my psychologist and she said I should not tell them personal information about myself. I could see both points of view but went with my T.

So today while I was working she comes at me . "You did this wrong, you're supposed to do it this way" I was trying to get my work done and she was in my personal space. So I tried to go around her and I bumped her. She says " you pushed me" I said I was just trying to get past her. I'm not violent and I don't push people. So three hours later she suspended me.

I feel relieved and sad at the same time. Relieved to get rid of her. I don't wasn't to lose my job. Nobody understands PTSD . I just want all this to go away. I can't handle this.

 

[Jenbrookify]

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that kind of boss :( it's not a very understanding thing to do, ptsd or not, but I can see how she's triggering things you have no control over. If I were you I would ask her to be patient and maybe even let her know you have ptsd. After all, how is she supposed to understand if she doesn't know?

 

[franciemarnie]

I am sorry you lost your job, but at the same time - good riddens! Who needs the stress every day of a jerk in your face. She would never have changed. - not unless she got in trouble maybe and who knows if that would ever have happened.

Time for a new path.

 

[BewitchedBewildered]

You do not have to disclose your PTSD to your immediate superior. It's good you notified your HR dept tho. You do not need to deal with being yelled at or talked to in a demeaning manor by someone who does not know how to supervise or coach people.

I think you should see your HR dept again. Is this a situation where you can request to be moved under someone else? If so, I would do that. But I would see HR and ask what options you have. And do not take all of this on your PTSD. You boss obviously has serious issues that need to be addressed regarding her people skills.

Or you can ask to have a meeting with your sup and an HR rep present. You do not need to explain your PTSD, but you can advise her (in front of a witness) that you have a medically covered condition that makes certain things difficult for you, for example personal space, yelling or raised voices, etc.

It's just a suggestion, but you have rights and should protect yourself in a way most comfortable to you. I would also put it all in writing. Or present it all in writing if that is easier. Maybe discuss that with your T. I wish you the best. We all need to be treated with respect.

 

[Notsowild]

Thanks everyone for your comments @Jenbrookify

After all, how is she supposed to understand if she doesn't know?

That's what the HR dept said but my T said they should not know all my personal business. So I didn't tell her. I did try talking to her by myself but she thought she did nothing wrong.

@BewitchedBewildered

Or you can ask to have a meeting with your sup and an HR rep present.

I'm talking to my union and then HR in the morning. Wish me luck

This is just all too much for me to handle though. I just want it all to go away

 

[LilBit]

The others are correct, this is far more than an issue of ptsd. Don't let this make you feel to blame. You are not. I do not have ptsd, but I do work in retail. I have dealt with several managers over the years who are incompetent and lack people skills. You do not have to tolerate disrespectful and abusive behaviors, it is not necessarily anything whatsoever to do with you having ptsd. It is your member of management being a crappy manager with inadequate communication skills.

 

[Barconian]

@Notsowild you need to be wild! The woman is an employee just like you, not the owner! Stand up for yourself or you will feel defeated :( I wish you all the best anyway

 

[Notsowild]

@Barconian...

Stand up for yourself or you will feel defeated

I want to stand up for myself but its just so hard. I'm already going through so much right now. This is something I did not need right now.
So hard!

 

[Notsowild]

@LilBit...

You do not have to tolerate disrespectful and abusive behaviors

You are so right. She has been this way to all of us. I just seem to get her rants more. She reminds me of my ex... Abuse you then buy you flowers ( which she has ) the next day and expect your forgiveness. She is not a boss. She is a dictator.

 

[Lucycat]

She sounds like a bully. I go with the others who say do not tell her about your PTSD. I did tell my boss and she has used it against me. For a bully you are handing them another weapon to get at you with. I seriously regret telling my boss, and T had advised against it, but I thought I knew better.

 

[Deleted member 20280]

I would go with the others in that a meeting on neutral ground with an independent witness is the best way forward. Unfortunately my superiors were all to aware of my condition and I ended up being sidelined into a back office away from the "Front Line". When what I needed was space to recover in a familiar environment, with familiar colleagues. I let too much info out and it destroyed my career in the end. No you do not need to give specifics or even tell them what the condition is. They do need to know however that you do have a condition that means you need space and that ground rules need to be put in place. Your super' needs to be aware that reasonable adjustments need to be put in place as do safeguards for you in the workplace. She is clearly a bully and if she is using anything to beat you down then I personally feel that in the circumstances this would fall under constructive dismissal if you were to lose your job as a result. Please make sure you speak with the HR department with a Union rep present. Even go to the extreme of getting a formal letter from your T for the Union to be in the full picture. If they are any good they should stand your corner very well.

Massive hugs @Notsowild

Laurie

 

[WillyKat]

I find it very strange that your HR dept. would ask you to tell your boss about the PTSD. That's why you talked to them, right?

Agh…I'm sorry you have to deal with such crap.

I realized not everyone would agree with the rest of this paragraph, but I feel the need to say it anyhow:

Personally, I have a very, very dim view of HR in general. That's based on direct personal experience. Their primary purpose is to protect the company from its employees. If they help an employee out, it's either an accident or incidental to protecting the company. I could tell you about several cases of women going to HR about sexual harrassment only to be fired. I can also tell you of managers fired because of a false complaint. My two cents: HR looks to see which one is expendable and screws them over. Sometimes that amounts to doing the right thing, sometimes just the opposite. I would never look to HR to help me out unless I was sure the person I complained about was already in some trouble. If they are in good standing, I wouldn't bother telling them anything.

That said, this may be an opportunity for you to find a better job.