I cant seem to grasp anything , I know what alot of you are saying , i get it when you see a therapist you learn the lingo, but I dont give two about the lingo or jargon , this is why i dont / wont go see anyone, I dont want hear fancy terms , or shit you read in psychology journals , I want answers , I know many in here will exact the same thing apon me " we cant help you if we dont understand what you want" I get it , I cant relay to you or anyone else the feeling i have which is basically f*ck it , i have zero motivation , im awesome at making other people feel great , but im terrible at making me feel great , and theres nothing i can do or anyone else , im not doing the "medication" thing , we'll have you take this to balance out that , which ultimately leaves something else out of whack, nope i did that in the past , that 3 years i lost , 3 years i cant remember , no , drugs arent the answer, anyway , without boring you all anymore, ill try to stay active here , but who knows , im a traveler , i go here i go there , i go nowhere , thats where im headed anyway