I'm So Confused

[GardenGirl0214]

So, I've posted that my current therapist suggested that I do EMDR therapy and recommended
someone who is trained in it because she is not. However, she suggested that I continue therapy with her while doing EMDR. I reluctantly agreed. I say reluctantly because I have trust and abandonment issues. The thought of a new therapy with a new therapist was and still is overwhelming to me. My therapist and I discussed this, and we again agreed that my continuing to see her would be helpful to me. Well, the EMDR therapist she recommended has been impossible to reach. We've been playing phone tag for almost a week now. We even tried leaving our availability on each other's machine, but that didn't help. I saw my therapist today and told her that someone who is that difficult to reach before we've even met was probably not going to be a good fit for me. She agreed and gave me the name of another EMDR therapist to call. Well, after looking at her website, i
I saw that she doesn't accept my insurance. I called anyway, just in case the website wasn't updated. That was earlier this afternoon, but I still haven't heard back. My therapist told me that she was going to contact this latest therapist also once our session was over today to give her some background info on me.

I am very depressed and anxious and given the way I feel and the amount of effort I've put in to trying to heal, I just want to stop ALL therapy, including with my current therapist. We talked about this today, although I didn't say I wanted to stop seeing her. We did, however, discuss my past history of running from therapy, and she's said, "You need to try and stay with it this time." But my thinking is that since she's not trained in EMDR but she thinks that's what could help me, why should I continue working with her? I do like her a lot, but is that reason enough to stay?

 

[Deleted member 33052]

I'm so sorry to hear that you're having so much trouble with this!

Having someone to talk to other than my EMDR therapist helps me, but I would suggest you go with your gut. One thing I'm wondering, thoug, couldn't your therapist work with the one she first recommended to schedule an (or many) appointment for you to save you the frustration?

Remember, we are here for you!

 

[GardenGirl0214]

My therapist can't seem to get in touch with this first EMDR therapist either. Apparently, the EMDR therapist has little to no time for returning phone calls. She definitely has tried, but from the message I received the other day on my machine, it sounds like she is overextended, as she said she sees clients from 8:00 a.m. until 9:00 p.m. with almost no break.

 

[edward333]

Hi GardenGirl, thanks for sharing. It sounds hard! Sounds like you are working hard on recovery and that you feel like you have seemingly little to show for it. It also sounds to me like you have a pretty good relationship with your current therapist -- talking through these issues. From an outsider's perspective I'm thinking stick with your therapist, but of course it's your call.

I have had lots of individual, group, and EMDR therapy, and in my experience EMDR definitely provides value that is different than other types. So I am excited for you to try it and hope you find a good practitioner who takes your insurance.

If you have questions about EMDR I can say more, from perspective of a patient and someone who has done a fair amount of research after-the-fact. (I did EMDR 2006-2011.)

 

[GardenGirl0214]

Thank you, Edward, for your response.

You are correct in saying that I have a good rapport with my therapist. She is the first professional I'vexperience told about my trauma. I guess my reason for questioning whether or not to continue seeing her is because I'm very discouraged right now and can't see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I'd love to get your perspective on EMDR therapy. Feel free to send me a message.

 

[EveHarrington]

I think that a better approach would be to have your therapist give you a list of all the local EMDR therapists in order of recommendation so that you can then do the research and find one that has openings and takes your insurance.

This one at a time deal is going to leave you frustrated and possibly take months to find an EMDR therapist.

 

[GardenGirl0214]

I think that a better approach would be to have your therapist give you a list of all the local EM...

I'm expecting a call back tomorrow from an EMDR therapist. I'm finding that there are not a lot of EMDR therapists in my area. This will be a phone consultationumber tomorrow, so I'm hoping it goes well.

 

[GardenGirl0214]

Update:

I have an appointment for a consultation next week with the EMDR therapist. Even though I know I don't have to make a decision yet about whether I want to proceed with EMDR, I am still quite anxious about meeting a new therapist to discuss a new therapy. I'm feeling very overwhelmed, as this is a HUGE step for me.!