Is Somebody Out There For Everybody?

[Bill Dickerson]

It's been a long time since I've even considered it. I've isolated myself so much. Sometimes I feel like a hermit.
(no offense to the hermits)

I get along with my ex but she only tolerates me for a few minutes at a time. I get lonely but I guess I've gotten use to it. It helps to think that maybe somebody out there might might be able to tolerate me.

It's easier to think of myself as a damaged SOB and nobody wants this guy. What can I offer?

It feels like my only redeeming quality is my sense of humor.

I guess hope helps me feel better anyway.

 

[Orglethorp]

I do believe that there's someone out there for everyone, for sure. As cliche as it may sound, though, I've always found that the best relationships happen when you're not looking for them. If you're ready for another relationship, and wanting to start one, then by all means make yourself available and put yourself in a position to meet someone (easier said than done, I know!), but don't beat yourself up over it if it takes a while for someone to come along. I actually met my significant other one night when a friend dragged me out and I was in no mood to go, didn't want to be there, and said maybe 5 words to this man in the 20 minutes that our groups stuck together. By all logic, nothing should have come of that meeting, but he saw something there. You just never know!

You say you don't have anything to give, but that's not true. The right person for you is looking for someone like you. Most importantly, you can give love, attention and friendship. Every relationship, romantic or otherwise, needs those things, and you can give those things. If PTSD gets in the way sometimes, then try hard to work on that, but also know that the right person will understand and want to help.

 

[Loyal by default]

Bill, someone out there is looking for you. Where, when, I don't know but, they are. I know this may sound like a cliche but, keep the hope and faith alive.

 

[Deleted member 19804]

I agree with the others. There is most definitely someone out there for you. It may take a long time, it may happen tomorrow, but you will find someone who makes you feel happy and complete. Everyone will, as long as they let themselves.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I have the same struggle and I have my doubts. For now I'm just going to try and let it go. I have a feeling I'd have to settle....I mean WAAY settle for someone given my current status and I'd rather just be alone than be with someone who doesn't have the qualities I'm looking for.

 

[BloomInWinter]

I believe there are many potential "somebodies" out there for each and every one of us.

 

[scout86]

I'm in the "maybe" camp. I'm not at all sure that there is, but that doesn't mean there might not be someone out there for YOU. How would you know unless you try? And you have the whole rest of your life to find out.

Meanwhile, I think we need to work on ourselves. To get to where we see the world as accurately as possible and deal with it in a healthy way. I think maybe you're dwelling on what you see as your faults. A sense of humor is a great thing! In fact, I don't think I could be in a good relationship with someone who didn't have a good sense of humor.

I haven't been in a lot of relationships. Most of those few weren't so good. Right now, my plan is to work on my own stuff and put the whole "relationship" thing on hold until I think I have enough insight to handle it better. If the opportunity to try again never comes along, I think I'll still be better off for trying to work through things.

As Orglethorp said, often you find a great relationship when you aren't looking for a relationship at all. Maybe that's because, at those times, we are as desperate and we make better choices.

Nothing wrong with "hope". It's a great reason to get up in the morning!

 

[Deleted member 20280]

Bill,

firmly believe that there is always someone out there for all of us. I have not had much luck myself but even that said My estranged wife was and always be a wonderful person and fantastic mother to our children. It was me that destroyed my marriage. What I am trying to say it that there are definitely people out there for all of us. I lost or walked away from almost all of my friendships after my breakdown and am finding new friends almost daily as I for me have accepted that there was a part of my old life that I had to shake off and leave behind. Take comfort that when you least expect to find friendship/comfort there will be someone there who is just the right person at the right time.

((hugs))

Laurie

 

[Barconian]

t feels like my only redeeming quality is my sense of humor.

That's a good start :)