Is this some form is dissociation? What is this?

[lovak]

Okay, so my trauma is based on sexual abuse as a teenager. But now I had a conversation with my mom that pretty much confirmed what I was already thinking. There is a big, big chance that I was abused as a baby. Under a year old

Its a couple hours later since that talk and I really don't feel anything, I don't feel angry or sad or happy or overwhelmed or anything. I just feel like it's not real. I actually wondered if that conversation happened a few minutes ago but she texted me some more after that so thats black and white proof. But I dont feel anything and I feel like I should.

Is this some form of dissociation or what is it and how do I get myself to feel anything besides turning to.. well.. not so good coping mechanisms that I havent used for a long time. But I dont know how else to manage this situation.
But I also think that if I start feeling it might not be pretty. Some advice?

 

[bhm]

Okay, so my trauma is based on sexual abuse as a teenager. But now I had a conversation with my mom that pretty much confirmed what I was already thinking. There is a big, big chance that I was abused as a baby. Under a year old

Its a couple hours later since that talk and I really don't feel anything, I don't feel angry or sad or happy or overwhelmed or anything. I just feel like it's not real. I actually wondered if that conversation happened a few minutes ago but she texted me some more after that so thats black and white proof. But I dont feel anything and I feel like I should.

Is this some form of dissociation or what is it and how do I get myself to feel anything besides turning to.. well.. not so good coping mechanisms that I havent used for a long time. But I dont know how else to manage this situation.
But I also think that if I start feeling it might not be pretty. Some advice?

I have a similar backgroung being assulted as an infant and all through my early youth, I also suffer from pretty extreme dissasociative symptoms at times when I become triggered, I've found that with trauma that you were to young to remember or events that your mind is blocking for coping reasons, the body memory becomes unlocked with more subtle triggers, like smells, sounds, and especially touch, I've struggled my whole life to have healthy sexual relationships but find during intamacy is when these deep will come to the forefront, which is somewhat uncomfortable and distressing when your trying to phsically connect with someone and start disassociating, try not to dwell on it to much but be aware of it and try and recognize when things come up, and if they do try and ground yourself to come back to the present. These deep traumas are tricky and can prove to be quite problematic, be gentle with yourself :)

 

[Abstract]

Absolutely, not feeling something in response which doesn't match the situation can be dissociative. Like a trip switch. So sorry to hear that. Hope the finding out brings you something positive in the mix of the rest.

 

[Justmehere]

Sounds like a little bit of derealization (a type of dissociation) around the conversation.

Just about everyone dissociates to some degree, even those without PTSD. It’s a spectrum.

To avoid the numb-flood cycle, try grounding and using other coping skills. You can use the search bar on the forum to pull up a lot of threads on grounding techniques.

 

[Changing4Best]

I had that kind of feeling not long ago in my therapy session. We were looking at an early childhood trauma and she asked me how I felt about it and it was like an empty feeling. I was kind of shocked that I was not outraged instead! So, yes, this surely can happen.

You might want to join our DBT/CBT Toolkit email group. Check out the Groups button above for the link to it.