Just a bad dream or repressed memories?

[cheymander]

Last night I was having nightmares of my abusive mom burning me with cigarettes. And a separate nightmare of complete darkness with the understanding that I was locked in a dark room and an overwhelming fear of something in that room that was planning to hurt me.

I've had nightmares related to my trauma plenty. But these are things that I don't remember happening, though I wouldn't be surprised to find out it did happen.

How can I tell the difference between a just a nightmare and a repressed memory?

 

[Sideways]

How can I tell the difference between a just a nightmare and a repressed memory?

For me, I always proceed on the basis that my nightmares aren’t factual, although they very often have factual elements to them.

Which is not to say it’s “just a nightmare”. My brain throws some pretty fkd up stuff at me when I’m sleeping. And very often it’s a fair reflection of what’s going on for me emotionally, or a soundtrack to something that my brain is trying to deal with.

 

[Weemie]

This one is actually a bit easier to solve than most - check the places on your body where you were burned in your nightmare. Is there any physical evidence of this? Minor burns can heal without scars, such as those obtained by touching a hot oven tray or spilling hot water on yourself. Cigarette burns are actually not minor injuries. They are caused by someone forcing a heated ember into your skin and pressing it there for longer than 1-2 seconds.

(Unless the person just touched it to your skin extremely briefly. But at least in my experience, someone doing this to you is intending for it to hurt and be a punishment, so it will be of a greater duration.) At the very least, this creates a 2nd degree burn. 2nd degree burns scar, although those scars will become a lot lighter with time. I have tons of scars from cigarette burns all over me, and even the oldest ones still have a faint trace.

If there is no physical evidence it doesn't necessarily mean it didn't happen. It could have occurred at a very young age (where skin is more malleable), it could have only been a split second that the ember was held there, your skin could have uncommon levels of elastin production and scars simply heal faster/better, etc. But chances are there will be a scar, or a faded mark.

 

[cheymander]

This one is actually a bit easier to solve than most - check the places on your body where you were burned in your nightmare. Is there any physical evidence of this? Minor burns can heal without scars, such as those obtained by touching a hot oven tray or spilling hot water on yourself. Cigarette burns are actually not minor injuries. They are caused by someone forcing a heated ember into your skin and pressing it there for longer than 1-2 seconds.

(Unless the person just touched it to your skin extremely briefly. But at least in my experience, someone doing this to you is intending for it to hurt and be a punishment, so it will be of a greater duration.) At the very least, this creates a 2nd degree burn. 2nd degree burns scar, although those scars will become a lot lighter with time. I have tons of scars from cigarette burns all over me, and even the oldest ones still have a faint trace.

If there is no physical evidence it doesn't necessarily mean it didn't happen. It could have occurred at a very young age (where skin is more malleable), it could have only been a split second that the ember was held there, your skin could have uncommon levels of elastin production and scars simply heal faster/better, etc. But chances are there will be a scar, or a faded mark.

I've got so many scars all over me that it's hard to tell what's what. But I do think I have some here and there that line up with cigarette burns in shape. But who knows? It wouldn't be the worst thing that's happened for sure but my past is such a muddled mystery that I'd love nothing more than to figure out the truth.