Kicking my partner while having nightmares

[chsyes21]

I have been wirh my partner for over a year. This doesn't happen often but usually happens a few times each month. While sleeping I will sometimes have bad dreams, talking in my sleep and even kicking when the dream gets violent or scary. It scares me and I know my partner is very concerned. I do not have any PTSD or history of trauma. It's possible I have always had this problem and maybe never knew it because this is the first partner I have ever slept next to every night. Now I dread going to sleep worrying this will happen again and I will hurt my partner. Had anybody had this problem. Any suggestions on tips I can try to stop this behavior possibly. Thanks in advance.

 

[Friday]

If I’m in a nightmare jag I usually go sleep on the stairs, or couch. Both are equally comfortable, in different ways, and both prevent me from assaulting the person I’m sleeping with.

 

[Freddyt]

If I’m in a nightmare jag I usually go sleep on the stairs, or couch. Both are equally comfortable, in different ways, and both prevent me from assaulting the person I’m sleeping with.

Yup. I'm the same. It's not just nightmare jags though......in hypnagogia (between sleep and awake) I can be violent to people, and depending how and whether I'm sleeping.
Couch, recliner, floor.......never tried the stairs though.....

 

[barefoot]

Might be worth seeing a sleep consultant/going to a sleep clinic to get an assessment.

There are all sorts of sleep conditions/parasomnias/behaviours etc that have all kinds of causes and treatments.

Could be caused by/linked to trauma, neurological conditions, sleep apnoea (where the periods of not breathing can fragment your sleep, leaving you in between sleep states, and this can give rise to parasomnia behaviours cropping up)

Hard to know based on what you’ve written, but worth getting checked out if it’s causing you/your partner problems (especially physical harm)

In the past (before I got my parasomnias more under control) I’ve kicked my partner, punched her in the face (thankfully, not hard enough to cause any injury but it was certainly a shock and upsetting for both of us), I’ve leapt on her, and grabbed her. Usually completely unaware that I’ve done it until she’s either woken me up or told me the next day

I went to a sleep clinic, was diagnosed with non-REM parasomnias. My therapist believes it’s connected to trauma/PTSD. The sleep dr thinks it’s neurological. As far as I’m concerned, it be either/neither/both and, for me, the cause doesn’t really matter as much as effective treatment because it was having so much impact.

I was prescribed melatonin (I’m in the UK where you can’t just go and buy melatonin - it has to be prescribed) and it has massively helped manage the parasomnias and reduce the number and intensity of occurrences.

As others have said, if I am in a stage where I’m having more frequent night terrors etc, we tend to sleep separately until things have settled.

Anxiety/stress can also cause disturbed sleep/bad dreams/a jacked up nervous system etc. So, relaxation before bed (watching an easy going comedy show, having a soothing bath, doing a few minutes of deep breathing exercises) may all help to ease things and lead to a calmer night.
But also may not!