Listing The Good Things

[Venusian]

Sadly what happens when we push ourselves into feeling something without processing the anger or hurt is that it doesn't get resolved and turns inwards.

This is exactly what I was doing. I had to leave this thread yesterday and come back today and read this again before I understood this sentence. Sometimes when I am struggling it feels like my mind just doesn't want to comprehend what is right there no matter how well written the concept is. It took me this long to realize how much anger and hurt there is, I am not sure I have discovered how much yet.

There is a lot of work to do and I am just beginning. I don't want to be stuck here but I feel like every time I take a step forward the finish line gets farther away or I should say the mile marker numbers just get higher and there is no finish line.

 

[Hashi]

I feel like every time I take a step forward the finish line gets farther away or I should say the mile marker numbers just get higher and there is no finish line.

I know this feeling so well. For me, I can feel like I've climbed a mountain only to see another one right in front of me. Still, those mountains are there whether I climb them or not, and at least I'm working my way through rather than still at the first one.

I've actually reached a stage where I can see how much work is behind me. Even though there's more to do, I'm very glad now of the effort I've already put in. It feels really worth it now, even though I was so dispirited then.

I'm struck by you saying resentment. I agree that resentment keeps us stuck. I also agree that trying to go from that to being OK with things would be missing the step of recognising the anger, expressing the hurt (to someone, not always to the people it centres on) and feeling validation.

I'm sorry this is so hard. Sending you support.