Childhood Longing For A Mother's Love

[Deleted member 41889]

I was born in Bulgaria and I was adopted around the age of two.

My adoptive mother molested me up until high school. Once I got older she did it in my sleep.

Now I long for a mother's love. I never got the love I wish I had. My needs were never met.

Can anyone else relate?

 

[Kintsugi]

Another adoptee, here... I wasn't sexually abused by my mother, but I was verbally/emotionally abused by her. Also neglected. My T is certain (for reasons I don't fully understand) that my mother was neglectful of me when I was an infant. I was sexually abused by my brother, who was also adopted and who was abused by our foster brother.

Have you always been aware of the role of adoption in your life? I recently "defogged" about my adoption issues.

 

[Deleted member 40217]

Thank you both very much for sharing your story. I am not adopted but many times wish I was. I never had that mother figure either. Between the many beatings and verbal and mental abuse. I longed for that a loving,caring and nurturing woman who held you when you were hurt or sad and took care of you when you were sick, injured or trying to battle cancer. A woman who protected you when you were being raped by your older brother and molested by your neighbor I hope some day, somewhere I know what it feels like to be loved by a true mother.............

 

[Fadeaway]

More than I can ever express. I was raised by my grandmother for a decent chunk of my life, she was just plain evil. My mother was a drug addicted who committed suicide. In fact just last night I woke up from a nightmare and found my self crying for a mother figure.

 

[foreveralone2099]

my mom was too mentally ill to be an adequate parent and my childhood was unhappy because of it. i find that as an adult i tend to fall head over heels for kind, usually much older men who are willing to identify and meet my needs. i guess it could be worse lol, i could still be attracting abusers.

we can't change what happened to us but we can try to move forward in a positive direction. not that "dwelling" on the past is all wrong: it's important to know why we act as we do.

 

[Thinkbig]

I have recently found a nurturing older woman that was willing to just love me. She has taught me what love even looks like. Boy, I had it so wrong! She has become my mentor and it has been such a blessing! I attribute it to God as this has come as an answer to prayer for me.

Don't get me wrong, the last woman I tried to seek wisdom from resulted in spiritual abuse. But I've never stopped looking. My whole life I have never stopped longing for someone who would make me feel protected and loved and treasured and not eventually try and feel me up. Sorry to be blunt.