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Looking For Other Police Officers That Can Relate.....

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Look, I'll see if I can be of any assistance, although I have a major problem with Police Officers on the whole.

When I was a child I was bashed pretty well daily by my father, who was a Prison Officer suffering from PTSD, it was unpleasant and it left me with a marked dislike of authority figures, especially those in Blue shirts. Then when I was a little older I was moved by my father to a school in the worst area, in terms of crime rate, socio-economic rating, etc. I had little choice but to bond closely with my peers, as the school in question was seriously violent and going one out was kinda dumb. So I ended up in the wrong crowd, then effectively leading the wrong crowd, but I was still a good kid (I never did anything I regarded as evil if you get my drift), I ended up in the Army Reserve and moved away from that area (desperately trying to get away from my reputation & "name").

Then I had a car accident, while on leave, but a Senior Sgt. who attended took it upon himself, based on my last name (he'd had multiple disagreements with my family while at school and after) to charge me with DUI based on a "verbal". I beat that on a technicality, as a technicality is all you are ever going to have to save you when you are "verballed" by a pro. That prick put me firmly on the wrong side of the law, despite the fact that I am by nature, conviction and experience more a sheepdog than a wolf.

That was almost 20 years ago, since then I have been involved in fights with so many arseholes I cannot count (I detest evil people), I've fought fires, I've carried an unconscious person out of a fire (while barefoot and wearing a t-shirt), and I've arrested violent offenders, while rescuing the people they've injured. It all comes back to me now, after I got injured cooking at home.

But if you think there are limited options for Police with PTSD, imagine how many options there are for sheepdogs classified as wolves at the whim of a single cop, with PTSD.
 
Yes, I agree. It does seem that a lot of the research and concomitant literature relates to the military and combat PTSD which understandably is where a lot of authors concentrate. I reiterate, however, that I do not feel PTSD is occupation specific, it can happen to anyone and I do not feel there should be shame or stigma in this. In relation to PTSD acquired by emergency service personnel I speak from personal experience without judgement only as a means of proffering some practical help as it was my experience there was actually little initial support for me. If its inconvenient for the employer to discharge their legal duty of care whether they are police officers, soldiers, nurses or fire fighters- tough! My advice to the initial post is to stay in there, keep the anger managed so as not to get arrested for anything and make sure you remain their problem to manage. They have to look after you and if they don't then there are plenty of lawyers who will, without a thought for their fee I'm sure!
 
My heart goes out to all of you law enforcement, soldiers, and other emergency personnel that fight for the safety of others. At times I am often very cold and angry about my own experience. The truth is, that I have allowed one bad person cop to give me a perception of the group, and I know that is just not the truth. Reading others post have helped me see the truth.
 
In my experience, people will be people regardless of the occupation or uniform, there are those who are good, those who are bad and those who can be both so easily it frightens me.

I do agree with the OP to the extent that in terms of action, OSIs are not being dealt with adequately enough despite having read a lot of research done specifically in the field of law enforcement.

Admitting the existence of OSIs means taking on a huge financial responsibility for employees who would have otherwise become attrition statistics. Not fair to the "damaged" employee who is now an administrative casualty as well as a psychological casualty.

I agree that things need to change and it is going to be a long road that will have to start with education and awareness initiatives targeting the administrators of our services.

We can still be useful to our employers provided they are willing to accommodate and assist us in our recovery - we still have so much to offer our services.
 
"He who learns must suffer. And, even in our sleep, pain that cannot forget, falls drop by drop upon the heart, and in our despair, against our will, comes wisdom to us by the awful grace of God." Aeschysus.
 
My heart goes out to all of you law enforcement, soldiers, and other emergency personnel that fight for the safety of others. At times I am often very cold and angry about my own experience. The truth is, that I have allowed one bad person cop to give me a perception of the group, and I know that is just not the truth. Reading others post have helped me see the truth.

Hey brat17, it is easy to develope an idea in our mind based on little life experience and that goes for Police Officers and people that have dealt with Police Officers. I am a recently medically discharged Police Officer with PTSD. The reality is that the majority of Police are acting in good faith and for the right reasons. People that fall foul of the law are sometimes forced to make decisions that are not ideal but the best response to a bad situation. Ultimately being able to see the human from each perspective is the best way to sort out problems.

It takes guts to come out and admit to having a long held belief that was changed by reading the posts of others. That is one of the empowering things about this forum is that we can be honest about ourselves and appreciate the value in shared understanding of another. I wish you well in your travels
 
For about 10 years I counseled victims of abuse. That included physical, mental, and sexual. A couple of clients were partners of lawyers or doctors, many were construction, coal miners, electrician, truck drivers, chefs, etc. A few, actually several, were partners of law enforcement officers. They stand out the most.

While the wife of a lawyer has a difficult time getting a fair divorce in a small town, particularly if he is abusive, the wife or partner of a cop has it the most difficult for the obvious reasons. There is a lot of corruption where I live as well. I have heard all the worst details, know which are the pervs as well, know their faces.

With that, being a single parent, I was hyper-vigilant in my teen girls, knowing that there is nothing we will not get past. i.e.-Know of too many girls who have done "favors" to stay out of legal trouble. Some who have given favors so that their parents do not find out they are sexually active (voluntarily).

I think it is idealistic to hold cops to this higher standard-but I did. We expect protection, and when the protector is the abuser-our view is shattered. It is still do-able. When you are victim of law enforcement, something changes. Just wanted to clarify, because I am generally non judgmental and do not stereotype. One bad apple on the force spoils the whole bunch for many. It took me a very long time to get back to where I am, and far from cured.
 
Hi Brat 17. I am sorry to hear your story. I can only tell you how I feel or see and what I was trying to convey was my admiration for your honesty and sharing. To be able to see that you have made it to where you are now compared to a long time ago I still see as positive and it is hard to know that there will ever be a cure but you are looking and asking yourself the hard questions. I have seen you contribute to discussions quite a lot and it is through me being able to read other peoples experiences that I have come to accept myself. Thanks.
 
A letter to the police officer who covered me with your jacket when you came into the house to catch a murderer and found that person holding my head under water. She had done that to me before, but before time it was in the toilet, and my father had rescued me.

When you learned I could not stand up, you carried me so gently out to your car, and spoke soft kind words to me. I was hoping you would take be back to your house. I didn’t want to live there anymore.

I know I went blind when I saw my sister’s body on the ground in front of the garage, but she had been my only protector until you came. And I hadn’t been allowed to talk to her in almost two years. It hurt me to see her dead body on the ground in all that blood and other stuff. After they took me to the hospital, the doctor’s said I had hysterical blindness. You will be happy to hear, I can see now (most of the time).

I wish I could have asked you in Human English to take care of my animal family who lived in the back yard, but since I’d not learned how to speak anything but animal speak, you didn’t understand my sounds.

You were my first kind person since my mother died when I was two years old. I want to say thank you with all my heart. If my sister had lived, she would have thanked you as well. Thank you for coming when our neighbor called you. I wish you could have been magic and got there before she died.

If you want to know what happened to me before you saved me, it is recorded in “How it began” pages 1, item 20, 34, and 39, from a ten year old child’s perspective. I think I was maybe 5-6 when you saved my life.

If you want to know about the girl who was dead in front of the garage (the reason you were called to come out), go to page 4, # 76

To all the police officers who see this type of thing all the time, please, know that the children thank you. They might not be able to say it, but I believe you need to hear that. For some of us, you were the only kindness in our youth.

I am sorry our trauma caused you to have PTSD. I’m sorry that you put your life on the line when you rescued me from those men who broke into my duplex. I’m grateful to that officer who wrapped that blanket around my naked body. I’m grateful to that paramedic who helped me to stop bleeding, and got me to the hospital. I’m so glad you arrested those three. The fourth one got away, but I know he repented (was sorry) and probably never did that type of thing again.

I thank you to the officers who got me off the freeway and covered me with your jacket the week my babies were kidnapped. I’m grateful you allowed me to fall asleep in your police car. I wish you could have found my children before I was put in that mental hospital, but I’m so grateful to you for finding them at that house before they were sold. Thank you for that. I wish my family hadn’t been so corrupt and taken them out of state before I got out.

Even though I fought you, to the officers who saved my life when I tried to kill myself, I thank you for breathing life back into me and getting me to the hospital before I died. Now, I know I had things to live for, back then I didn’t know that.

To the officers who came into that 7-11 and saved me after I got shot by that robber, I thank you. I’m sorry you had to see all those dead bodies. I thank you for being so gentle with me. I’m sorry you got PTSD too.

To the officer who’s nose I broke. I thought you were one of those men my ex-husband hired to kill me. I didn’t mean to hurt you. As soon as I saw your uniform I stopped, but I had already done the damage. Please, forgive me. It’s really hard when you have PTSD from multiple traumas. And next time, (if there is a next time), don’t pull a woman’s top up over her face and allow the world to see her naked breasts. Thank you.
 
I went to a clinic for awhile here in Canada that specialised in Trauma induced stress conditions.So although I have never heard of a clinic specifically just for police, well, why not try one that helps military?

What's the name of the place, and where is it? I'm an ex-soldier turned police officer, and I need some help. Thanks.
 
The Operational Stress Injury Clinics in Canada are specifically for Soldiers, ex Soldiers and RCMP. They are based all across Canada. Where are you living?
 
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