Mental Hospital

[furley]

Has anyone ever been hospitalized for depression ?
I had been a few years back and around this time I always get horrible paranoia and flashbacks of a woman in the unit screaming in my face how she would kill me. Went through withdrawal of two medications.
"No meds till your blood pressure goes up". is what they said. It was only two days. Then they released me. Yeah,It haunts me..so much of it. It made my ptsd worse for a while.
I would never hurt myself or anyone, I'd never even think of it.
How does one get over an experience such as being trapped like that ?
Counseling only made it worse..hince the paranoia of the medical field hanging on my every word.

 

[shandemonium]

I used to work in social services and heard many stories about these places. In CA most state hospitals were shut down in the 80s which is why we're so famous for crazy people wandering the streets in hordes of thousands..

However, there are still mental hospitals run by the state for people with severe problems or people who are too crazy for jail so the cops take them to a place like where you went. I was assaulted once by a crazy woman and found out that's where they took her (she also tried to run someone over with her car that day)

I am so sorry you had this experience and I can relate to the mistrust of doctors and counselors.

Have you tried any alternative healing? There are so many, I'm not even sure the right words to use. Basically, anything that people are doing that does not require medical school or systematic training. Healers, shamans, stuff like that.

I have been helped this way. It's not an easy thing to look up in the yellow pages, so keep faith that your healing is possible and keep searching!
Finding people who can help and are outside of the "system" might make you feel safer.

Also, be careful what you say in ANY hospital. They have 5150 authority and they have done this to a friend of mine who was just there to ask questions about resources for his depression. He said the wrong thing to the wrong bureaucrat and was 5150 for 3 days in a psycho-ass place like the one you described above. Screaming people shitting in their hands etc...

A lot of folks I've noticed on this site are from other countries and haven't tasted the vile American system that leaves its citizens to die in the streets. You and I have.
I don't mean to put anyone down from this site, I just felt compelled to respond since we are in the same f*cked up country!

From one American-system-survivor to another I hope I can offer some support.

 

[desiderata310]

:nailbiting: That was the OPPOSITE of what my therapist told me about all of this! He told me it was really hard to be 5150'd
I've been stupidly honest with him about my suicidal ideation.
oh dear god....

 

[Powder]

Furley, how long ago was this hospitalization?

Thanks, Muse

 

[Justmehere]

@furley - I am so sorry for what you went through. :( I have been put on a mental health hold by a clueless doctor. It was a traumatic experience. Since then, I have seen doctors and therapists with training in trauma and they are extremely reluctant to put anyone on a mental health hold because they know the risk of it being re-traumatizing. I have only begun to talk through what happened with my current therapist in detail... she really gets it... she worked at one for a very brief while before she too was traumatized by how badly it was run.

I've been stupidly honest with him about my suicidal ideation.

@desiderata310 - It is hard to be put on a mental health hold - and it has become even harder in the past 2-3 years as state mental hospitals shut down and/or reduce beds. You have been very WISE and SMART to tell him about your suicidal idealization (which is not enough to get someone hospitalized) because he is able to intervene and help support you so that you don't get to a point where you would be hospitalized against your will. The fact that you have told him and he hasn't called the police to take you to the hospital is a good sign it was very safe to tell him and you made the right decision.

 

[Ladyghosthunter]

Honey, yes. I've been in the hospital three times and there is NO SHAME in it. The doctors have misdiagnosed me for over 20 plus years and if they knew/asked about my abuse, they would've known.