Sufferer Mindfulness

[ground crew]

While I was picking myself up with the help of the va a couple of years ago, I discovered a group that studied mindfulness and meditation. Now I am a little too paranoid to sit with my eyes closed long, but the mindfulness thing seems useful. It helped me find the pause button on both my startle response and sudden anger. It also has helped me stay present and less stressed during social events and at work.

Am I alone in this experience?

 

[NarcSis]

Not alone. Many people have been able to harness their symptoms through mindfulness. I found when all else failed, it provided me with the greatest progress in battling my PTSD.

I cope day to day by being mindful and as a result I'm able to function quite well in my comfort zone.

Congratulations!

 

[ground crew]

It has been useful. Maybe Ill find a safe place and try meditation again....

 

[watundah]

My therapist and I have discussed these at length to help me stay.present and not dissociate. We've Also Started meditation at the beginning of my sessions to help calm my anxiety. I need to turn it into a daily habit like flossing - mental floss.

 

[hodge]

I learned a good mindfulness exercise from my therapist a couple of weeks ago. I put a hard caramel candy in my mouth and just focus on it for a couple of minutes. It really helps. Especially before therapy. I'm supposed to do it three times a day, but usually don't. Need to make myself do it, though.

 

[ground crew]

mindfulness is a tough one to get. "stay present" what the heck does that mean? I finally got it when I reflected on how focused I was during some of my stressors. Nothing like a near death to focus on the NOW! Then at other times, like when I am on a bike ride, out far from my problems, just feeling the wind and sun, my body and how it moves, my form, the road for danger the environment. okay, that helped me understand it but I didn't Grock it until 2 things happened. I was asked what it "felt like" when I got startled. (I have a really big startle reflex. People avoid startling me....) so an opportunity arrose when a roommate jumped out of a closet at me, catching me completely by surprise. I felt the defend reflex go up and found a way to feel the whole experience, at some point I realized it was a joke and simply braced for impact instead of counter attack.

It sounds so simple: what does it feel like? but do we really take time to record the feelings or just the images as the shit hits? from previous incidents I can recall all the reasons for my moves, the decision tree, just not what was going on with me. This time I connected two dots, and there are many more to connect, one was the brain called for the fight or flight response, the body responded and the adrenalin caused a bunch of changes in my body I felt, perhaps for the first time. I made the connection but it still took a lot of practice to make the information useful, lots of practice.

 

[Tinyflame]

Maybe Ill find a safe place..

@groundcrew do you mean an internal or external place? Thanks.

 

[ground crew]

@groundcrew do you mean an internal or external place? Thanks.

I am distracted by my vulnerability with my eyes closed, that vulnerability is not isolated to one location, so the unsafe feeling is from the inside. Thanks for the question. My intention was to find a place I felt safe, external safety. Good question.

 

[Fadeaway]

I have done this once last week, but It really increased my anxiety. I could see this being of use when I am dissociated, but what about when you are hypervigalent and hypersensitive to all your senses. I was already feeling over stimulated.

I don't mind going to a safe place in my mind. I do that already, but When I am like I was, just nope. Is this meant to be used during those times too?

 

[NarcSis]

From what I understand being mindful is a grounding technique, so yes, it is especially useful when you are feeling anxious, triggered or dissociated. It is designed to bring you to your present moment and out of the past you are trapped in inside your brain. For example, right now - right now I am sitting on a couch, I can feel the material of the cushion against my skin, I can feel the coolness of the keys on the keyboard, I can smell the coffee brewing, I can hear the hum of a fan, etc. etc. This is just me being mindful of my current place in time and during a trigger/dissociative/anxiety reaction realizing that there is no danger and that what I'm experiencing is physiological reaction to memory, rather than reality.

You can redirect your cognition to the present moment at any time and it really helped me to cognitively understand the actual distance from my trauma that I was and so it made it easier for me to understand memory vs. reality. It didn't suddenly and miraculously get rid of my trigger episodes, it just helped me to cope with them more proactively, which is the goal, restoring your power over your mind.

@ground crew, you don't necessarily have to close your eyes to meditate. I used to find that closing my eyes was the scariest thing in the world, so I skipped that step and kept them open. Meditating is just the ability to harness your focus and keep it trained on one thing while allowing the body to naturally calm itself. I always made sure that I was in a comfortable safe place when doing it. I limited visual stimulation - stared at a blank wall and kept the room I was in quiet (or as quiet as I possibly could). The challenge with meditation is training your brain to eliminate distraction and focus, usually your focus will fall on the natural rhythm of your breathing. As I got more centered and comfortable, I was able to close my eyes and reach a new level of internal peace. Meditation is tuning your awareness of your constantly running internal dialogue and being able to shush that in favor of peace and calm. Try staring at a candle and quieting your internal dialogue by focusing only on the flame, it's another way to "meditate".

 

[ihateusernames]

It's one of the most useful things I have found. My current therapist lady has ordered me to go through an exercise online every day. Hopefully being accountable for it will turn it into a more regular habit. You don't have to close your eyes. The thing she sent me to has a scene to look at or you can pick any number of things to focus your gaze on. I don't like closing my eyes, either.

@hodge wow, the candy thing, that's a great idea! And a good excuse to eat candy. I'm going to have to try it. I used to never be without a piece of gum. I think I was using it in the same way and didn't realize it. I decided it was a "bad habit" and stopped, but maybe that wasn't for the best.

 

[watundah]

Soft focus, gently looking at the ground with eyes half closed is an option.