Mood instability and update

[ILoveLife]

Hi guys! Hope everyone is doing okay..

I haven't been here in a few months, mostly because I was avoiding obsessing about my trauma due to being triggered all the time, and things are going better for me also.

I was finally able to confront my mother about her abuse, and I realized she actually feels guilty about it. She knows she was reenacting her own childhood abuse and neglect, and I think she would do things differently if she was able to start over. Ever since we talked a few months back, things are different. She's still not my favorite person in the world, but she's a lot better and less bitter and mean. I'm rearranging my life now to be able to leave her house and regain my independence.
I now believe that if my father was alive I would put him in jail for the sexual abuse, something I didn't think I could do before.

My bipolar diagnosis was dropped, and my mood instability is now attributed to my past of substance abuse and trauma. I'm slowly dropping my meds, but I asked to be on the mood stabilizer because it keeps suicidal ideation at bay.

Last time I was here I had just started therapy anew. I now realize the sheer amount of horrible stuff I wasn't able to process due to my previous T's incompetence. I would like to thank you all again for opening my eyes regarding him.
New T is great. Upfront and kind and incredibly smart. I like when my beliefs are questioned in an intelligent way, especially if they're put under a light and analyzed appropriately.

I still have parts, not sure about DID, but it's not dysfunctional, so we've decided only to deal with it if it becomes dysfunctional, otherwise I deal with it fine on my own.

My question here is about mood instability. My mood goes from okay, to strong and uplifted, to stuck in bed thinking I can't handle life anymore, without the mood stabilizer. I would like to know if any of you here managed to eventually drop meds or deal with it without meds at all.

Thanks for reading and thanks in advance for your answers :)

 

[EveHarrington]

I’m the same with my moods, but the bigger issue is the constant hourly fluctuations due to hyperreactivity to my environment.

I’d also be interested to know if others were able to come off of mood stabilizers......even though I know that for me, I’m probably going to be on them for life. Mood stability is more like a final key to the puzzle that I’ve been working on for quite a long time. I’ve been through enough to know I can’t do it on my own, at least I don’t think so.

Adding.....I’m only on a low dose of mood stabilizer anyway. Most people take higher doses than I do.

 

[ILoveLife]

I had constant fluctuations too, but that stopped. I also thought it would go on forever but it didn't. Right now it just happens with certain triggers, such as family gatherings and such. There's hope, Eve :)

 

[Changing4Best]

I'm on mood stabilizing meds and plan to stay on them, unless my Dr.s feel there is no further need for them. I am mid-trauma therapy, so it is possible that at some future date I might not seem to need them or I might not need them once I am done with this therapy. (If I ever am). Or I might need less of them. Time will tell. I have been diagnosed Bipolar, but my mother and sister both are also, so I think that dx is correct, as well as the PTSD one too.