More sex issues

[Yusuke22]

Got triggered during sex last night. Boyfriend did something that he knows sets me off. We stopped. I got stuck in flashbacks. He finished himself off while I was reliving the reasons that sex is difficult for me. That part hurt more than the rest. I feel sick about it. And lost.

 

[prynne]

That was incredibly inconsiderate and cruel of him. You don't deserve to be treated that way. Does he often seem to not care about your feelings?

 

[EveHarrington]

That’s abuse. He KNOWS what triggers you and does it anyway. You set a boundary and he crossed it. It sounds like he cares not so much about you and more about getting what he wants.

 

[Sideways]

That part hurt more than the rest.

Can you think of what would have been helpful for you? For example, cuddling, or perhaps giving you space?

Do you think you'd be able to talk to him about that? For example, "If I ..., it would be comforting if you would..., would you be willing to do that?"

 

[Tickety-boo]

That individual experience wouldn't be enough to make me want to break up with someone, but what it says about who they are and their feelings towards me would make me break up with them. That's a pretty clear sign of sociopathy. Sociopaths are very good at seeming sweet and saying everything right most of the time, but then they go and do stuff like this. It usually only gets worse and worse as they see what they can get away with. They'll make all kinds of reasonable sounding arguments that are really just victim blaming, blame shifting, gas lighting, whataboutism, etc. They'll act like the victim and make you apologize to them, that kinda thing. If any of that sounds familiar, time to move on. If you don't know what these different manipulation tactics are, do some research on them and other tactics people use to make you seem in the wrong and then watch out for them.