Sea, you express what it feels like to come home with PTSD very well. Takes me back to 1969 and coming home with the Calley stuff going on. Anyway, what happens when we come home with PTSD is we live out our PTSD symptoms until it gets so bad we are willing to concede that other people aren't the problem, that our perceptions are screwed up by PTSD, and that we need help and support in learning to understand and manage our PTSD symptoms. Then we can begin the process of learning to live better with ptsd a little bit each day.
When I came home, they hadn't invented PTSD yet, but someone did suggest I needed to seek out some help at the VA. I politely explained to then what they might do with that notion. It took me until 1995 to actually present for therapy at the VA. 27 years of living out my symptoms. It wasn't all bad by any means. But along the way I trashed a lot of potential careers, activities and relationships. And as time went on my options dwindled each time I trashed everything and started over.
I hope it takes you less than 27 years to begin to do the things you need to do to learn to live better with PTSD. But if you need 27 years that's ok. Learning to live better with PTSD is at your pace.
Ted
When I came home, they hadn't invented PTSD yet, but someone did suggest I needed to seek out some help at the VA. I politely explained to then what they might do with that notion. It took me until 1995 to actually present for therapy at the VA. 27 years of living out my symptoms. It wasn't all bad by any means. But along the way I trashed a lot of potential careers, activities and relationships. And as time went on my options dwindled each time I trashed everything and started over.
I hope it takes you less than 27 years to begin to do the things you need to do to learn to live better with PTSD. But if you need 27 years that's ok. Learning to live better with PTSD is at your pace.
Ted
