My Triggers Are Kids!

[Horst]

My triggers are babies and little kids, also pregnant women. The real triggers for me are not so much the sight of them, but the sounds they make - the crying, the cooing.

Avoidance probably isn't the solution. I'd say therapy is, to deal with those distorted thoughts. That's what I had to go through, and will probably always have to go through, every so often.

 

[Nadege]

I stand, transfixed within the moment, wondering what that child is feeling that I never, ever felt.

I do understand.

What happened to you? Did you lose your mother?

(If you don't want to talk about it though, then never mind.)

 

[Sveta]

I completely understand. My kids are triggers for me, too. Even when I was pregnant with my first child, I had horrible, horrible nightmares and flashbacks. I was alone in the apartment, pregnant, and anxious because I was afraid I would end up being a bad mother like mine was. I think I made my first anxious too, when she was born. We were home alone a lot, and I constantly fretted and cried. Probably some post-partum in there, too.

I remember reading everything and feeling like there was no way I could be a good mother. A lot of the trauma I endured while taking care of my siblings as the oldest.

Even now, in some situations, my kids' experiences cause me flashbacks. Also, I think to myself, "when I was their age"...and I remember the horrible experiences. My daughter looks just like me with different hair, and when it occurs to me that she is the same age I was when much of the worst stuff happened, I go into a tailspin unless I move around and do something.

I am a new diagnosis, so I am starting therapy next week. I hope this helps, sometimes I can't bear to be around them due to sensory issues as well, but I love them so much. One of my kids has Asperger's syndrome, so we have some challenges, too.

I think some things will always be triggers for some people. I am learning not to be ashamed as I deal with this.