New Here, Suffering From Hyper Vigilance

[Momma Kitty]

My ex tried to get me labelled bipolar because of my "manic" hypervigilance versus my complete and total exhaustion with crashing depression in bed. I used to do drugs on a small level, but my problem became food/eating. "Comfort foods" and hiding became my way of coping. Yeah, I too am a fat, not overly so for a grandma, but the obsession or rather distraction of coping with PTSD can go either way. It is all about our control issues.

 

[Danhigh]

Hi,
I too am hypervigilant and have been for a long time. I wake up in the morning with a wave of nervous energy that shakes my whole being. How can I carry on with such feelings? I too think of my family and friends. Its good to know they are there for me.
My therapist is a great support and understands what I am going through. He has faith in my ability to recover. I know I should be more patient but is hard to be patient when everything is so overwhelming. I don't know how to help myself.
I guess I need more time before things start to settle down.

 

[Nicky31]

Hi Meowbot,

Good to see you here. I'm really pleased that your therapist has been able to explain some of the stuff that has been confusing, frustrating and upsetting you by telling you about hyper vigillance.

I too felt like that until I was properly diagnosed. Not able to grasp why I was constantly watching out for risk- even in my own home but more often out and about. The past few weeks, like you, I've been hypervigilant even in bed- so waking really easily and actually jumping. I hope that now you understand that it is all part of the condition that you can work with your therapist to manage and cope with this.

Different things work for different people. Working out your triggers is especially important, so I don't go to pubs for example and avoid such things unless I'm properly prepared. It's not to say you can't ever do such things again, but it's useful while you work through stuff. Also if you are tired don't push yourself. I also find that walkiong and taking exercise helps tire the body and is good for you so can help you sleep a little easier, as is a bedtime routine, hot chocolate, a bath, reading something not too challenging.

I hope you go from strength to strength, but remember that it's not a bad thing to have bad days. It's all part of recovery.

Nicky :hello:

 

[onebravegirl]

Hi there. Do me a small favour and take a deep, slow breath...That is your first step to recovery right there.

I really feel for you and your intense struggle, reading your words brought back to me all those old feelings in myself. My heart goes out to you. :Hug_emoticon:

Right now things may seem very overwhelming I know but there is a huge amount of reasons for hope. People like myself have been where you are and we are better now. You will be too. It will take time of course. Even though you sounded afraid you also sound determined. That's good. Really good. Recovery is a slow process and the going slow is important so as to be thorough.

Even though the Hyper-vigilance tells you to run, you don't have too.
There are a lot of pent up and suppresses emotions in you that need time to release. Our emotions store up inside us just like our thoughts. Everything we see and experience our mind needs time to process. Now a days, most people do not give themselves the time to do this. We justify, excuse, avoid, hide, blame-you get the picture. Eventually, our mind says "ENOUGH! I will slow your body down so I can make you pay attention to all this Unpacked baggage". This is the beginning of PTSD.
YOUR job is to slow down and listen. You are fighting this process if you keep putting yourself down, cutting yourself up (figuratively-I used to cut too) and blaming yourself for unusual reactions.

The fact that your partner doesn't understand is reasonable. The more they know the more help the two of you can get together. Isolation is fear, and fear limits growth so please please try and be brave. You have hidden strengths that you are about discover. Because along with what you have endured you have survived. We are all here for you, you are not alone. There is light. Beautiful light at the end of this. You are not alone.

O