Relationship New relationship- stress and isolation issues

[Leigh9297]

so I sucked my pride up, not hard I am a strong empath which tends to let me put up with most things, but went with my gut...I asked him if his PTSD is triggered with the work/life stress, and low and behold I got a instant response...I apologized and just said that I care and im here whenever. He said, yes, thank you, its been a bad few weeks.

 

[Leigh9297]

I know he is, he has framed medals in his home, photos and other things I noticed when I was there, he isn't lying to me.

 

[grit]

I honestly think this could be PTSD or million other things like he is married or has someone else on the side.
Two months and he is exhausted, imagine 10 yrs! I just think rather than falling into the caretaking pathology, maybe recoop and look things objectively. He could also just lost interest and being polite in the most annoying way.

You do not know the fella.

 

[Pippi427]

I firmly believe that work stress can trigger this stuff. It's because it causes one to feel out of control. My relationship is relatively new. 6 months. Also a combat PTSD vet 15 years in the infantry. He just started a new job with a lot of stress and seeing horrible things all day. I'm in the dark again and it sucks. He'll come out occasionally to help if I have an emergency, like when the police located my stalker and I was freaking out. Still...I'm stuck between asking for what I need for support and worrying I'll push him over the edge. I mean...I am there for him. Even though it's a relatively short relationship I've supported him through a broken leg, a surgery, panic attacks, learning to deal with diabetes sheesh. I'd do it again, but don't push me away!

 

[Hojay]

In my personal, unpopular opinion: people date and flake all the time. It can start out with a wonderful connection, then somehow fizzle out to sporadic contact. In these instances, one party is always confused and blindsided by the change. The only difference when PTSD is in the mix? The pursuing party has a possible (not verified) explanation for the switch and will therefore hang on way past the situation’s expiration date. If he didn’t mention PTSD, would you still be pursuing? I hope not. If the guy can’t explain to you in semi-coherent grown man words what is happening, what he needs, and how you figure in he’s not ready. It’s harsh, but true. PTSD relationships are no joke. If you got one without reasonable communication skills, it’s nigh impossible.

 

[Angel_Rain]

I have been seeing a man for about two months, we live about two hours apart, so we don’t get to see each other that often, everything has been great we were talking every day for the first month or so but then when things start getting stressful with work, he is a CEO and president of a company. He always explains to me details of what is happening, when I ask him how he is, I always get the reaction of being exhausted. Dates have been canceled, contact has been more spaced out. Just this week he was supposed to come to a concert with me and I got a message later that evening saying that he was overwhelmed with work and completely forgot. I haven’t heard from him since and it Sunday. I know he has PTSD because he mentioned it during the Fourth of July, but doesn’t use it as an excuse. So I’m curious to know to what extent does it affect him. He served in the Air Force doing special ops for seven years about 10 years ago. I don’t want to be ignorant but curious to know if the triggers still are strong. I’m trying to be supportive by giving him his space but I really want to reach out to him to see if he is OK.

Either he has PTSD or he is seeing another woman. Men will manipulate you.

 

[Angel_Rain]

This kinda sounds fishy...

Most combat vets I know wouldn't share this so early in a "relationship". Tread lightly.

yup

 

[Pippi427]

My vet waited about 8 months before even vaguely mentioning any details. Not sure what is normal, but that is what happened with me. I knew he was in the infantry in many conflicts, but not the actual details of what went on until much later. Even now he has not scratched the surface. Just hearing once about one thing was enough for me.

 

[somerandomguy]

Men will manipulate you.

We will? All of us, all the time?