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Now Medication Free And A New Lease On Life

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Thanks Wendy, it is just... I guess I don't feel much if any depression right now. You don't realize what part still lingers until you feel good. I feel so good now, like a weight is lifted I have been carrying on my shoulders for years now. I am ready to start making some steps out into this world again. Not ready to leap, but ready to step out. I hope this will make others decide and see they can too. I was a wreck when I got here.
 
He will finally be getting the woman he feel in love with (part) back. I think we are both going to be doing worlds better. With me like this his work did much better and kids were happier, everyone will be better for this! Even the annoying parts like now LOL.

Absolutely awesome Veiled. So happy for you:biggrin:
 
Depends on your meaning of work. Do they control symptoms? Yes, but only short term. Then you have to keep taking more and more until it is too much to be safe and must come off.

Are they a band-aid or crutch, again certainly. But remember those are not meant to be used forever either. Just very short term. Then while you have the band-aid or crutch you must go through healing and then lose them to heal further.

These medications can be very useful as a relief long enough to learn some skills of healing. Sadly I took it for over a year before I knew I needed therapy or what was wrong. I had to do it (learn) while weaning for over a year. I am not finished learning. On this one though I think I have a pretty good idea most certainly now. These drugs are dangerous and should be used with the utmost care.
 
Veiled,

Wow is all I can say. I've been gone for a while and there is a big difference in your posts. You've helped so many people by sharing your experiences and it's awesome what you've accomplished in your own healing. It's awesome, awesome, awesome!!!!

Nam
 
Thanks again guys. And Nam, thank you so much. I have missed you around here! That is a wonderful compliment coming from you.

I just wanted to update I am still drug free. Now that I am back home this week from Houston I am just shocking myself! My husband has asked more than a few times who are you and what have you done with my wife?

I have cooked and cooked. And real cooking, things that take 5 hours to prepare. I made almost 100 pirogies yesterday. Some fruit and some potato and cheese. Extra for my MIL even.

I have been pushing hard for people to shut off the computers and spend family time. I have been saying I love you so much more and hugging my teenager. He smiles but not wild about it. I am cherishing my family time so much more instead of hiding from them.

I made new popcorn recipes tonight, ranch and peanut caramel corn.

Everyone yelled until I said fine no movie tonight (they did not want to do it). Some reason when I gave in they changed their mind? So my manly men watched The Color Purple. My husband (who would never admit this) got chocked up and had teary eyes. Admitted it was a good movie. I thought he was laughing at a moving scene when his tummy jerked and as I turned to scold I saw it was not a giggle but crying.

I tried to get him out tonight to watch the stars at a nearby lake on a blanket, but he is not ready to just go do like I am trying. He is has not been around this in a while so I will try to go slower.

I went to a huge grocery store (not the little local market) for the first time since I moved here at Christmas.

I went to the little market this week all alone. I even went and paid my bills at city hall. Now I will admit I walked and still not driving. I did fight paying the bills but hubs forgot to pay them and I really had to.

Also, went with hubs to check out the lake. It was gorgeous. I cannot believe that place has been so close and I have not enjoyed it. So hubs and I have been looking at new camping gear so we can force the kids camping. I cannot wait to go fish in it!

I am getting a different kind of tired, not stress but doing things. I am seeing a re sparked light in my hubs eyes. He is tired in a good way too. He is more willing to get off the net. He is laughing. Everyone is smiling more. Laughing more. Laughing with me from being silly. I forgot how I was.

I am having my interest come back from years ago. This is too awesome.

I still do have some bad anxiety attacks but most are short. I bounce back fast. I was able to focus and come back from derealization. This is all like the most wonderful breath of fresh air.

I did learn PMS and no Xanax is a new kind of hell, but I hope it won't last long. PMS is hell but a little less would be nice. I guess it can't all be good. Roses do have thorns. But damn they smell sweet.
 
Veiled,

Ah hon.....Great job. I am so happy that your world is alive again, instead of being dulled through the fog of drugs.

I bet what you are feeling is like being re-born, so everything around you is new and crisp....Go and experience all the new wonders in your world....I am so happy for you...

Remember to stay grounded during the anxiety attack. possibly taking vitamin for the PMS will help too. I know that exercise will help, but I didn't want to push my luck...LOL!!!!

Congrats again hon.....

Wen
 
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