I'm curious to get your thoughts on a book I picked up that has to do with chakras as they relate to stages of development
Personally, I know almost nothing about chakras and am not terribly interested in that perspective. But you could create a thread and I'm sure people would respond because I know that framework does resonate with others. If they relate to energy centers, as you learn about the nervous system you mind find a connection that is helpful to you. Really I have a lot of lung/heart issues, sensations, and supposedly related chakra manifestations. But the chakra approach is too weak for me and, for me, I just can't muddle around with too many things....like I focus on therapy and certain resources for the trauma stuff. Other people are better at conjoining systems though.
Also, my heart/lung stuff relates to my trauma...and that's also the area where we feel the vagus nerve as sort of "on" or "off"...so like potential for warm fuzzies and connection vs disconnection and shutdown. I do feel sometimes how I can reactivate it a bit. Sometimes it's feeling very quivery in there when I'm confused...like in therapy and "safe" but not feeling sure of it in my body. Other times it feels like I can't even hold myself up because I feel myself collapsing in my mid-section. In the rare moments when I feel safe and connected I feel like warm stream in there that actually correlates with the path of the vagus nerve {"social engagement system" which shuts down in face of chronic trauma}. But that's kind of another topic for another day.
he doesn't seem to draw too much from other theorists or have a lot of research backing
Yes, that would tip it a little more towards a self-help book than a theoretical one (with resources based on the more solid theoretical basis).
I fear he pathologists what could be described as fairly normal misattunment between parents and children
Yeah, that's not okay. Nobody on earth had perfect parents. Thank god we don't all have PTSD. What I generally see in working with kids is that good parents can be misattuned. The kids seem more anxious in some ways. Is that a perfect correlation? No. Is anxiety the same as PTSD? No. It's a big spectrum. Misattunement to a degree does not equal CPTSD. Makes no sense. Chronic neglect, shutting a kid out and ignoring them, or making contact primarily through abuse? That would be more obvious. But I know a lot of busy, imperfect parents who love their kids, keep them safe, take care of them, but aren't in perfect attunement all the time.
I wonder here too if the focus is more on emotional feelings, whereas trauma really dysregulates the nervous system. You can have low self-esteem from shitty parents, or anxiety, without having PTSD...and thank god, because that would be easier to treat. Personally, I don't feel my self-esteem is all f*cked up. Probably I just lack for self or am too generally disconnected to have a feeling about myself. I simply feel like slicing myself up when overwhelmed and I prefer avoiding humans when I leave work. But there is probably some personality preferences here. I am much more a "thinking" type than a "feeling" type.
Good point there
@Suzetig . Maybe he meant to write a broad overview but the angle was too personal? I tend to dislike books with that tone...prefer perspective of lacking (unobvious) personal connection. Heller's and Van der Kolk's books are like that. Van der Kolk's is piecey and broad, but at least longer chapters that are well-focused on a theme and backed by connections to a lot of research. Heller also talks about attunement, but I didn't read that part much because the main focus of his book was very basic disconnection created in first months/years of life. Of course my mom was misattuned. But my issues were before and also beyond that. She misattuned to my siblings and they aren't out there destroying themselves. They are somewhat hermit-like, but they manage to keep more basically regulated.
The attunement phase is a little later than basic connection (initial ability to attach) and I sometimes wonder if there is more of a connection between that (like years 1-5) and symptoms that are more like borderline. Or not...just something I wondered. But really terrible and chronic misattunement or unpredictability (ex. mom is an addict) can wreak havoc on emotional regulation, for sure (so more severe emotional regulation issues, not as severe fight/flight/freeze and dissociation...???). I don't even want to connect really. But when I do, it's painful to even try. I never felt that other people need to regulate me, or could even help, because I withdrew so early and felt better, apparently, shutting down.
