Paying bills is so scary!

[cupfish]

I love this board, I am with my own kind! ;)

Today's biochemical brain pain is over paying the bills. Why? Well, there is some financial insecurity right now in my household but that doesn't warrant my gnawing grinding belly ball of stress and fear.

I get that sometimes we have dough, sometimes we do not. C'est la vie. But I grew up listening to my dad worry aloud, constantly and vividly, that we were going to lose our home. He had PTSD (a very severe case) too, and implanted his anxiety in me. So I know where it comes from, I know it's not really warranted today, but I am having trouble not being triggered by this.

Ideas?

 

[Tinyflame]

Wow not yet, but were we twins? :wideeyed: :(

:hug:

 

[cupfish]

Trauma twins. New circus act.

 

[Tinyflame]

:roflmao: T'N'T :p:cool:

 

[SeekingAfrica]

Today's biochemical brain pain is over paying the bills....

Funny, it's like you're talking about me:D. I kind of feel like a certain amount of emotional/mental issues perhaps inevitably comes with some financial instability as well. May be I'm wrong. Either way I'm on the part of times with more problems right now, hope I cruise through them alright.

 

[cupfish]

So ridiculous, isn't it?? I get the pit of fear in my stomach, and feel like a total failure.

I HATE THIS

 

[SeekingAfrica]

So ridiculous, isn't it?? I get the pit of fear in my stomach, and feel like a total failure.

I HATE...

I have frequently gotten so "wired" (anxious to point of panic attacks and feeling sick to my stomach) about any tiny uncertainty in paying some bill or buying something I feel I should buy, that I end up overworking. I end up trying to work myself to a breaking point, which makes my work less productive, so less income...it's a self-fullfilling prophecy, in a way. So after ruining my progress many times because of this, I am now taking meds...I figure I can use some stabilizing and caring just a bit less, while I go to therapy to work through my issues.

 

[Anarchy]

Avoidance of paying bills is giving me a good kicking at the moment.

I can't even look at them, and I think they've probably bitten me already.

 

[cupfish]

Cmon go open the envelopes Anarchy! Remember your brain is LYING to you about the severity of the problem. You get chemical signals of anxiety and fear that are closer to a grizzly attack than opening the stupid bills. Yes it sucks. Yes you may not have enough $, but what you are avoiding is a math problem, not a life crisis. Isn't it ridiculous how paralyzing living in fear can be???????? good luck I feel you agita.

 

[cupfish]

Today I am struggling, but feeling just the NORMAL amount of billpay anxiety -- with a smile, because it's really all okay but the adrenaline sucks!

 

[Deleted member 34424]

At least you know where it comes from and is not helpful. So, don't listen to it. Pay the bill/s you need to, check your bank account BEFORE and AFTER paying, and if it's all good, when you anxiety is happening, say aloud or in your head "anxious thought/feeling".

 

[FauxLiz]

I have such a hard time with paying the bills that I literally have every bill except my rent on autopay. I have tried to be the responsible adult sitting down twice a month and paying the bills as they come due and I get paid but I either procrastinate to the point that I am months behind or I have such a panic attack my daughter had to fill out the checks and I would just sign them to keep the utilities on and the rent paid. When electronic bill payment became an option I took it not just for my credit but because I needed it for my peace of mind.