Stephernovas
Gold Member
I have been seeing a physiotherapist for concussion related symptoms (overall healed - I'd say I'm still 10 to 15% symptomatic), some lower back and neck/shoulder issues from my trauma. We (doctors, therapist and myself included), started noticing PTSD symptoms, and was diagnosed after an assessment. Before the accident I had just started seeing a therapist regarding family issues, and since have chosen to stay with her to help me with the PTSD as well.
My issue is with my physio. I feel like he's been too focused on noticing my moods and hearing about my PSTD versus actually working to help me figure out what's wrong with my body. There was a recent instance where he pushed this book about pain onto me. I declined reading it saying I didn't need it and I was quite self-aware of my body. I told him I know the difference between stress, pain, and soreness form working out. He kept pushing the book on me (literally harassed me for 5 min with me saying "no", and him going, "why", until I started tearing up and told him it was a trigger). I LOVE my body. I love being functional and I love being able to move. The gym is my life. I miss it so much and am getting upset each day I'm losing muscle and gaining body fat. HOWEVER, I'm fully aware once my body is functional again, I'll get back on track in the gym in no time. My physio however, seems to like playing therapist with me and I feel he is too interested in my moods and asking me about my symptoms. It really irritates me because it's as though he's treating me like my physical symptoms are either all in my head, or not as bad as I'm making them out to be because of the stress and tension PTSD makes it out to be. He hasn't been direct in giving me a concrete diagnosis, and gives me random exercises that don't seem to follow a plan. He's recently stated that he has reached the end of things he could do for me, and he's not sure where to go from here (which amps up my hopelessness and doesn't make me too excited to waste my time seeing him). He also told me I believed things we did in the appointment were hurting me rather than helping me. I tried to clarify with him that I was only pointing out what was hurting so much because he wasn't giving me any answers, and what he was doing wasn't helping. He also told worker's comp that I had pain-focused behaviours, and called them the other week concerned about my 'low mood'. The way I found out about this was because worker's comp called my therapist and asked her if she was worried about my low mood. My therapist said she scoffed and said 'no'. I trust the work the therapist and I are doing, but I feel this physio is way too worried about my mood and interested to hear about PTSD than to help me. I explained to worker's comp I was not too excited about seeing him because he basically told me there is nothing he can do for me. So now, i'm being sent for some assessments, and physio has referred me to the kinesiologist in the office (so we can actually try working out again).
Independently I went and got myself a trainer. I knew before, and still know to this day that from the accident I do have some sort of injury in my shoulder and neck, and am thinking the low back pain is a strain/muscle imbalance. 1) it does not feel like sore muscles from the gym 2) my performance at the gym displays clear weakness in my ability to lift overhead, or use my shoulder muscles (I tried a push up and could feel the pain in my pectorals) 3) my trainer noticed imbalances.
Oh and at my last physio appointment, he noted I was quiet and asked "why". I said "just cause", then he asked "why" again. I gave him the same reply. He goes to write something down in his notes (I assume about my mood again), then goes and gets a machine to use. But, before he left, he flipped the paper over so I couldn't see what he wrote. I lost it. I was about to flip it over and read it, but didn't. Throughout the treatment I sat silently and exhaustedly zoned out. He asked me if I was still seeing my therapist, and I replied "yep". In hindsight, I should've said "none of your business". I'm so effing sick of him. My therapist wants me to set boundaries with him, but it's triggering when he counteracts with "why" and his nosiness.
I'm thinking of next appointment asking to see the notes in my file. If he declines or causes issue then I will state I no longer want to see him. If I read it and there is nothing to do with my mood, then I will have to dig it out of me to have the conversation that him asking about my mood and PTSD so much has made me uncomfortable (I almost panicked when I tried last session). Or, I'm considering calling worker's comp and telling them why I'm uncomfortable with him, and am going to hold off on any appointments with him until we get my assessments done (Dec 11), as it is making me upset going to see someone who has told me he doesn't think there is anything he can do for me (huge trigger).
Ugh. Help me?
EDIT: The reason I was so exhausted in our appointment is because I was just coming down from about a week and a half of being suck on hyperarousal.
My issue is with my physio. I feel like he's been too focused on noticing my moods and hearing about my PSTD versus actually working to help me figure out what's wrong with my body. There was a recent instance where he pushed this book about pain onto me. I declined reading it saying I didn't need it and I was quite self-aware of my body. I told him I know the difference between stress, pain, and soreness form working out. He kept pushing the book on me (literally harassed me for 5 min with me saying "no", and him going, "why", until I started tearing up and told him it was a trigger). I LOVE my body. I love being functional and I love being able to move. The gym is my life. I miss it so much and am getting upset each day I'm losing muscle and gaining body fat. HOWEVER, I'm fully aware once my body is functional again, I'll get back on track in the gym in no time. My physio however, seems to like playing therapist with me and I feel he is too interested in my moods and asking me about my symptoms. It really irritates me because it's as though he's treating me like my physical symptoms are either all in my head, or not as bad as I'm making them out to be because of the stress and tension PTSD makes it out to be. He hasn't been direct in giving me a concrete diagnosis, and gives me random exercises that don't seem to follow a plan. He's recently stated that he has reached the end of things he could do for me, and he's not sure where to go from here (which amps up my hopelessness and doesn't make me too excited to waste my time seeing him). He also told me I believed things we did in the appointment were hurting me rather than helping me. I tried to clarify with him that I was only pointing out what was hurting so much because he wasn't giving me any answers, and what he was doing wasn't helping. He also told worker's comp that I had pain-focused behaviours, and called them the other week concerned about my 'low mood'. The way I found out about this was because worker's comp called my therapist and asked her if she was worried about my low mood. My therapist said she scoffed and said 'no'. I trust the work the therapist and I are doing, but I feel this physio is way too worried about my mood and interested to hear about PTSD than to help me. I explained to worker's comp I was not too excited about seeing him because he basically told me there is nothing he can do for me. So now, i'm being sent for some assessments, and physio has referred me to the kinesiologist in the office (so we can actually try working out again).
Independently I went and got myself a trainer. I knew before, and still know to this day that from the accident I do have some sort of injury in my shoulder and neck, and am thinking the low back pain is a strain/muscle imbalance. 1) it does not feel like sore muscles from the gym 2) my performance at the gym displays clear weakness in my ability to lift overhead, or use my shoulder muscles (I tried a push up and could feel the pain in my pectorals) 3) my trainer noticed imbalances.
Oh and at my last physio appointment, he noted I was quiet and asked "why". I said "just cause", then he asked "why" again. I gave him the same reply. He goes to write something down in his notes (I assume about my mood again), then goes and gets a machine to use. But, before he left, he flipped the paper over so I couldn't see what he wrote. I lost it. I was about to flip it over and read it, but didn't. Throughout the treatment I sat silently and exhaustedly zoned out. He asked me if I was still seeing my therapist, and I replied "yep". In hindsight, I should've said "none of your business". I'm so effing sick of him. My therapist wants me to set boundaries with him, but it's triggering when he counteracts with "why" and his nosiness.
I'm thinking of next appointment asking to see the notes in my file. If he declines or causes issue then I will state I no longer want to see him. If I read it and there is nothing to do with my mood, then I will have to dig it out of me to have the conversation that him asking about my mood and PTSD so much has made me uncomfortable (I almost panicked when I tried last session). Or, I'm considering calling worker's comp and telling them why I'm uncomfortable with him, and am going to hold off on any appointments with him until we get my assessments done (Dec 11), as it is making me upset going to see someone who has told me he doesn't think there is anything he can do for me (huge trigger).
Ugh. Help me?
EDIT: The reason I was so exhausted in our appointment is because I was just coming down from about a week and a half of being suck on hyperarousal.
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