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Poll Positive Psychotic Symptoms And Ptsd

Did you ever experience psychotic symptoms, either hallucinations or delusions as part of your PTSD


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zaniara I can see how it may be difficult to differentiate a hallucination from a flashback since it is so subjective. Personally I have never hallucinated but I have had several flashbacks and I had become very delusional.
 
I find the results of my poll to be very interesting, in fact very surprising to me even despite so few respondents
 
I found myself wondering the same thing -- what, exactly, is the dividing line between "flashbacks" and "delusions"/"hallucinations"? I can say that I've had "interesting" experiences with mild flashbacks, where I feel like I'm caught between both the past and present. I've also had PTSD-related paranoia, where I immediately jump to negative conclusions about how people regard me, or where I believe people to be doing things behind my back. These episodes have been few and far between, luckily, but the worst part was that it took me so long to realize that these were delusions.
 
I always have had delusions- bizarre thoughts & beliefs (phobias mostly), trapped in my own little world unable to connect to others, its just that they don't usually totally consume me lately. I stay grounded more. When I feel good I feel so in tune with everything, my inside world is mixed up with the outside world but its manageable, the paranoia becomes positive & everyone can see me & its not so bad. I'm in the flow. When I do feel bad its total hell and everyone sees how awful & disgusting & weak I am. I'm trying to do this without meds but I know I'll have to go back to them if I can't keep this balance, the emotions spiral out of control again and the stories & theories & intellectualizing just take over. I feel more alive now but the bad spots are really bad, the strange connections I make almost entirely negative. I feel crazy alot but its a so much wider & creative POV at the same time. I'm not sure if any of this made sense.
 
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I suffer from both hallucinations and delusions. Usually these are triggered by reality-based, identifiable situations (attachment insecurity, threat to self, etc), and they are feedback loops - meaning they are very specific and repetitive reactions that I have been dealing with for most of my life (i.e. fight, flight, freeze). However, it has only been recently that have I been able to identify them as delusions because the initial and recurring traumatizing events supported the cultivation of the loop.

There have also been a few times where the delusion has been planted in my thoughts via verbal or visual hallucination, and I (unknowingly) obsess about the thought and empower it through paranoia (i.e. that person is going to hurt me, I'm being spied on, it's not safe to leave the house, etc). Then it becomes a conviction based on zero realistic evidence. But I don't recognize it as such until long after it has taken place. I don't know whether these experiences are caused by C-PTSD (particularly hypervigilance/environmental scanning), or something else.. I'll get back to you once I see my P next week.
 
@Ed Norton, I'm wondering if you can make use of these ideas in a beneficial way. For example, you said:

I think the delusions were a way for my brain to protect itself from psychic pain.

I have all sorts of views myself about working with consciousness to help with psychic protection from symptoms. In particular, I've used powerful visualisations (positive imagery that I'm in control of) to stop hallucinations, flashbacks and nightmares.

I'm curious as to where you might take this idea of delusion as psychic protection. Can you use it to help your recovery?

I'm wondering this because you obviously already have a facility for accessing different realities. That might not have manifested in the most ideal way so far, if you've experienced it as delusions and flashbacks. I'm wondering if you see a potential benefit if used in other ways?

For example, in my personal experience going easily into hallucinations is linked to being able to go fairly easily into what Jung called active imagination (quickly looked up a link - this may not be the greatest one but it seems reasonably close to what active imagination means to me: [DLMURL]https://realitysandwich.com/56857/jungs_active_imagination/[/DLMURL]). This is something that gives me understanding and guidance for my own situation.

You've had different experiences with consciousness, and you might have a whole different view on where these things could take you. I'm not suggesting that my approaches are right for you. My question is about what you think these ideas might mean for you.

I ask that partly because trying to apply a concept to a practical situation is a big part of exploring the concept. Partly because I believe these kinds of experiences are very much internal ones and to a large extent we need to look to ourselves to understand them.

If that makes sense.
 
@Hashi, To tell you the truth I have never thought of my delusions in that way before. The most positive thing that I could think of in relation to my delusions is that while having them my flashbacks stopped. before I became delusional I was in therapy but my trauma was not addressed. I was just told to move on and not think about it, The whole world seemed weird and scary and my mind crrated an alternate reality. I guess the only other thing that was positive about the delusions is that they gave me something to laugh about I could not believe the nonsense that I used to think was true and sometimes I laugh about my former thoughts.
 
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