Profound Silence

[arfie]

I have experienced intermittent profound hearing loss my entire life. As a child I was mute until 3rd grade and still needed speech therapy after a teacher finally managed to get me to open up. There is much room for the suspicion that both were hysterical; caused by emotional rather than physical problems. Yet another piece of my puzzle which eludes certainty. For sure, my selective hearing has been a gift in my adult life. I can and have routed circuit boards in video arcades.

I am nearly 60. That puts a predictable layer on the equation... Hearing aids amplify to many background noises to be helpful.

My in-laws have always enjoyed profound silence in their home. Now that they have a private nursing staff in their home, foot steps on carpet are unbearably loud for them. My eldest son goes into screaming fits at any and all sounds. Fits that disturb the neighbors as loudly as they disturb even my diminished hearing. My landlord knocks on the door to complain about the noise of putting up a picture. I am a graphic artist...

The sounds of silence are becoming a problem for me. Like profound deafness has already arrived...

Thoughts? Experience? Suggestions?

 

[Everhopeful]

Can this be something like Conversion Disorder, perhaps? I am trying to familiarise myself with it, as my husband (sufferer of C-PTSD and mood disorder and suspected Borderline Personality Disorder) had been labelled epileptic all his life from early childhood. Yet even the best medication does not seem to prevent the fits. And having witnessed four of them since living with him, I am more and more convinced it is something more related to trauma and extreme psychological distress and not so much due to organic reasons. (I am not a medical expert, but there was extreme state of emotional distress preceding all of these fits, and he does not seem to pass out totally, nor lose ability to make sounds while in the fit, and his body becomes very rigid but there is no series of jerking and twitching uncontrollably. And he regresses into a childlike state and starts talking about his abusive mother hitting him, shortly after the fit).

I believe Conversion Disorder can manifest itself as a fit, or temporary blindness, or temporary deafness, or temporary paralysis of a limb etc. Sounds like it is a "conversion" of sorts of extreme psychological distress into physical manifestations.

 

[Deleted member 23044]

Your eldest son may benefit from some ear plugs. I have used ear plugs before and they work, and they're cheap! Albeit a little annoying to keep track of.

Your landlord is complaining about you hanging up pictures? Dang that is tough. Hmmm, depending on what you're hanging up you can, perhaps, get a large board that you can hang up once and be over with and thereafter pin up pieces(quietly), or get some kind of board with hooks/hangy things where you can use the hooks noiselessly, or, install hooks/hangy things once and use them over and over again. Or just use tape. Explain to the landlord your work, and that you've taken their complaints into consideration and will take steps to lessen the noise(and that you are open to their suggestions as well?).

That's the best I can do. I'm an artist as well! And going to school for it where they have those large boards where we pin up/tape up work to critique. I hope this gives you some ideas, good luck!

 

[franciemarnie]

I began losing hearing coincident with trauma in childhood. I have profound loss in some frequencies, severe in most and a little almost normal in high frequencies. I couldn't wear hearing aids which amplified all sound until they came up with the digital type in my 40's, which theoretically are programmed to fit a person's particular frequency loss.

I have done some research and learned that the amygdala is related to hearing. Nothing definitive but there is a connection between the fight or flight brain and our auditory nerves.

When I have been in extreme states of hyper vigilance, etc., any noise - even slight - was painful, which makes sense because our senses become so highly acute.

Also stress floods us with acid which wipes out oxygen which is necessary to the conduction of sound thru the cilia I think. My tinnitus will be amplified with stress. My brother lost hearing in one ear the morning my dad died.

It's all connected I think and some people may be genetically more conducive to hearing loss than others.

There is so much they don't know about the ear. I learned that the hard way.

Have you tried digital aids? They aren't a miracle cure, but I couldn't live so well without them.

Hearing loss can be such a drag - leading to isolation, depression, etc. we need that like a hole in the head!

 

[arfie]

I have been watching the digital designs closely. They do look a step better than sticking an amplifier in my ear canal. Still telling myself it is better to guard what is left of my precious hearing than worry about hearing small talk. To me, hearing remains a precious gift. I play musical instruments daily and sometimes feel like Beethoven ready to saw the legs off his piano. Something else for the hearing cursed to complain about... Sigh...

 

[franciemarnie]

My digitals turn down the background noise. I can't hear music without them unless I have IPod earbuds on at the highest level.

Digitals won't diminish what natural hearing you have. I have had both old fashioned aids that amplify everything and the digitals. The former are worthless with my loss. The digitals brought me back to the world. Something to consider someday.

I know a lot of people have a block against wearing hearing aids that is difficult to transcend. There are digitals that fit inside the canal that no one can see.

I couldn't function without them. I am glad you can still hear music. I couldn't live without music. Not happily anyway!

 

[Britt.f7]

My sight is what I have problems with. Hearing seems to be intact. Though I know if I am focused on something intently it is hard for me to hear what someone might be saying to me at that particular moment. I think that kind of irritates my husband, but if I'm wrapped up in writing, or typing away, I can not focus on something separate. Which he really shouldn't get annoyed with me since he lost some of his hearing while doing home reconstruction and can't hear if there is more then one sound going on at a time.

They say as you get older noises get to you more often. I'm hoping that's not true, but I can definitely see it starting to happen. Franciemarnie sounds like she has a good idea to your hearing issues. If you see it as an issue. The digitals seem better then the normal ones I've heard about. My Uncle just turns his off if he doesn't want to hear. ;)

Edit, I should say, I think my emotions effect my visual, smell, and taste, why couldn't it effect my hearing, or your hearing? Seems logical to me.

 

[arfie]

@franciemarnie Vanity is not an issue for me. Don't care how it looks. I won't be looking at it. The idea of sticking things in my ears sounds as sexy as poking a needle in my eye. I have been watching a model which fits behind the ear and seems to work on the same technology as the guitar tuner I keep clipped on the end of my guitar.

@Britt.f7 Hope you don't go through the aging noise sensitivity. My in-laws are night blind and so noise sensitive that their home feels like an over-lit mausoleum. My mother's state nursing home is far, far more pleasant to visit.

 

[franciemarnie]

@arfie - I'm with you. I can't see them so what do I care how they look. Mine are over the ear. My old ones were in the ear but the overs have teensy buttons so I can tune out background or people behind me, etc.

Off topic. I want to play music so bad. I want to play the piano. I'm wondering if I could get a keyboard and somehow teach myself. I love the guitar too but when I tried as a kid, it didn't feel right. Like it didn't feel like my instrument. More like my brother's.

 

[arfie]

@franciemarnie I started on piano and still love the organizational simplicity of the keyboard. All traditional Italian notation used in western music notation was developed on its scales, making it the foundation of all our music. Still, somewhere along the way I had to admit that guitars are far more portable than pianos and guitar became my primary instrument. But I still have a 1905 upright grand and four keyboards. You can pick up a keyboard to get ya going for almost nothing at thrift stores, garage sales and pawn shops. Another option is rental. You can try it and if it doesn't fit, not much more than the price of a first run movie lost.

We need a new musical term for music. Bob Dylan WORKS music. I play. I reserve the right to play with any instrument that crosses my fancy. Hope you'll get to playing, too. It is even better therapy than YouTube, even with reports from those hearing cursed types.

 

[franciemarnie]

@arfie - Guess what I downloaded three days ago. Greatest Hits of Bob Dylan!! No lie. Man I wish I had been there in Greenwich Village back in the day.

I am going to look into getting a keyboard. I think I can plug in ear phones or something so my husband couldn't hear and just me right? I always wanted to do this. That would be something cool to do on those long nights I can't sleep.

I do love the guitar though. My brother got a band together in his 50's but he always played. One of the only good memories of long ago. There was peace in the house when there was music.

 

[Britt.f7]

@franciemarnie I married into a musical family. I am not musically inclined, but I think it is great when people go for it and play. I use to just play at the piano, when I was younger. Have one sitting in my living room. No one here to hear me tinker at it. Some keyboards do have a place to plug your headphones into. Just make sure they do before you buy it. My sister had to down grade from her piano when she moved, but she is totally happy with it. Kudos to you for giving it a try.