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winterose

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So I been in a bit of a haze because of a sinus infection I been fighting, I noticed a piece of paper on the nightstand I didn't remember the look of and that is one of my triggers. My predator liked to leave calling cards to me. Some quick flashes of the fear I used to live in, times of things left. Then I felt this anger boiling up. I said out loud, you're dead mofo, you have no rights to my life anymore. I survived you. You aren't allowed to come in anymore. I cried, let the feeling go through and out. Still a little shaky from the adrenaline jump but going out anyway. Wanted to share that see, even I still get thrown off too. But everytime I feel stronger inside then my past is one more step for self confidence for me. Im so relieved, I got here.
 
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If being in real peace is able to take the bull by it's horn and get on with it, I'll take it. This is a first of many firsts this past year for me. My predator died earlier this year after harrassing me for over 20 years. I think the difference is he can't come back. I don't have to worry it starting all over again. This time what I am applying is sticking. For the first time I have hope. Thanks Helen for your encouragement.
 
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