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Relationship Ptsd And Cheating While In Korea.

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He went to Korea for a year. The kids and I stayed in TX because my oldest is in HS, and I plays sports etc. Anyways............
When he got to Korea he became very withdrawn, and wouldn't talk to me much, when he did he was short, and sometimes just mean.
End of September or first of October ( I don't remember much of what happen in the weeks after)
I found out he cheated on me with a girl that was in Korea for a month for training. He says he was in a self distructive stage, and had planned on killing himself. This girl kept him from killing himself. He begged for my forgiveness and started seeing a psychiatrist and a counselor. We worked through as much as we could over the phone. He came home in Jan. and retired after 21 yrs May 1st. He has had so many "episodes" I can't keep count. He is not well enough to really talk about how bad he hurt me. Don't get me wrong he knows, and takes full responsibility for it. I just feel like I need to talk about it to help heal. I do see a counselor myself. His new job will require him to be gone 7 days in a row,(7on 7off) He is very stressed with starting a new job and being a civilian. His PTSD is always there, some days more than others, so he is very distant. I don't want to relive Korea again. Any advice would be wonderful.
 
We have not had counseling together yet. We have been going separate. Trying to work on ourselves before we work on us. Should we do both?
 
Couldn't hurt... my vet and I will try anything once. You never know what will work and what won't. He even did acupuncture and felt relaxed for days afterwards, so you can never tell :)
 
I would caution cheating is not a PTSD symptom. It is not a listed. If I have found anything it is PTSD brings to surface a characteristic that is readily available due to personality traits. I say this with much love an caution as a spouse who has been betrayed and forgave......BUT is it a deficit already there?.... That question should be established. Not simply PTSD symptoms (while yes, they make bad choices)) but beyond PTSD....Familial acceptance, or ignorance. Please never excuse an action of betrayal as PTSD......that is all I am saying
 
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