ED Ptsd & eating disorder

[Deleted member 40995]

I'm trying to recover from years of being starved.

It was 'just' an eating disorder before then, and I d...

its the same with me, after so long I don't even feel hunger anymore. sometimes I don't even realize I haven't eaten in a few days because I just don't get hungry anymore. makes it easy to slip back into the bad habit when i get stressed and need to have some control in the situation, I just quit eating.

 

[Muttly]

Yes. My ED is much more under control than it has been in the past but it is raising it's ugly head again.

@AddHomnym Yes, I am a man

. I feel like I switch between issues. If my anxiety is low, my ED behaviors are awful, and vice versa... Do you both have the same problem?

This makes sense, since the ED is a way of managing symptoms

 

[ms spock]

I am really struggling with my disordered eating at this time. I eat my feelings. I am putting on weight. It is really hard.

 

[Muted]

I think I’ve done something to my metabolism from years of not eating. My weight is all out of whack now and I don’t eat much and am continually increasing my exercise. I don’t know how to eat normal or fix this.

 

[Finchlet2]

I feel like a weirdo now because when circumstances are trigger I tend to use my anorexia which I was hospitalized with on and of when the abuse was happening to feel more in control. I'll generally only starve myself down to six stone now then I'll find another coping mechanism. (please don't copy this it is not safe I have put my body through repeated hell to discover its limits and its 90% luck and only 10%savvy that I'm alive). I hate having control over anything or anyone other than myself so when I feel out of control I internalise all my destructive coping mechanism whilst until it goes too far actually being more productive proactive and calm externally. Go figure

 

[ms spock]

My eating is so bad at the moment. I just have the overwhelming desire to be numb. I am finding it really hard to resist eating and comfort eating, and binge eating.

Before going to my bedroom I am taking stuff with me. I moved house to be safer and it hasn't worked out.

I was at a social event for three days and I ate my way through that. I am really regressed significantly.

 

[Finchlet2]

The quest for numb oblivion seems to be something most of us share. I'm going to stop trying to feel numb now
and try to feel something different.

 

[ms spock]

Still an issue - stopped the binge eating but then forgot to have a meal.

 

[LosingHope]

Hello,

I was wondering if other people are dealing with the daunting task of recovering from an eati...

I have a very longstanding eating disorder and CPTSD and both are very much related. I am very unwell at the moment with both and am finding it very difficult to manage the task of recovery from both. Its comforting to know that there are other people who can relate as it is a very lonely experience.

@hojita @brokenEMT Thanks for your replies guys. I've been find...

This is so true for me too! The ED helps me to cope with the trauma symptoms so if I am trying to fight it, the trauma symptoms sky-rocket until it becomes too much and I go back to the safety of the ED.

 

[ms spock]

I really struggle with my eating in a big manner. It is a moment by moment decision not to comfort eat, so I am back to working on self compassion.

 

[shatter eyes]

Overwhelmed today.
Public people. Busy streets.
I went in cafe and hide.
2 spanikopita
1 sausage pie
1 chicken soup
2 cream puffs
1 homemade cheesecake slice
...then cream puff to go.

I feel really bad because i went to another place and got noodles and giant apple cinnamon ice tea.

It all seems to be a balance game... if i give too much mental energy i end up scared and avoiding public...but home to get home.... get food stoned?

Got home tried to throw up.
Couldnt. Got super dizzy and weak.

I relapsed...to this day i still do not know how my stomach holds all this food.

I feel sick

 

[ms spock]

Someone made a joke about being in a food coma to me this year, I didn't know that other people knew it was a thing. I didn't binge eat before going to bed last night. That is big progress for me.