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General Rant and complain thread open to all supporters

*rant* I often want to answer your threads but then I do not know if my advice would be good advic...

I agree with @Snowflakes. Most people here can decide if the "advice" is appropriate for them or not, but sometimes sharing the post can be cathartic for you and the rest of us. That's how communication happens. I think most of us have forgotten at times how normal communication happens since we're so used to metering everything we say all the time.
 
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@NaeNae75 Thank you for your post. About your question on whether I have PTSD. Yes, I have been diagnosed with PTSD by the VA. That was from the VietNam war and a long, long time ago. Great therapy and a lot of time since the stressors means I manage it well enough that I seldom think about it and I didn’t think it was a factor in being a supporter for my wife who has C-PTSD. Perhaps you are right. I appreciate your insight.

I didn’t think of being empathetic as being a double edged sword but you are right.

More than you know....thank you for your kind thoughts :hug:
 
@NaeNae75 Thank you for your post. About your question on whether I have PTSD. Ye...

I'm glad to help! My PTSD was diagnosed almost 20 years ago, and I generally manage fairly well, similar to you, possibly. But I know that there are times I can't explain my feelings or reactions other than to possibly chalk it up to my own PTSD. That's why I asked.

I still see a therapist. Some is for me some is for our relationship, some is for outside influences... but once in a while I still get triggered - generally by my father. (A Vietnam era PTSD Vet as well.) He, however, doesn't seek treatment.

I feel a lot of kinship with you. It seems that a lot of our journey is similar, but backwards from each other. (Somewhat of a mirror image)

I hope your having a better day. You most certainly deserve it. I'm praying for your wife, if that's okay. I'm praying for healing and peace in her life so you two may have some peace together.
 
Hello @Snowflakes, I love your picture of that beautiful Christmas tree btw.
Like I said I cannot give any good advice, but you said you would love to have lousy advice so here it comes.
I am a Christian and maybe my advice does not make any sense for those who are not but then I believe you are one because you chose a Christmas tree as your avatar. When I go trough times like this it helps me to remember that we all are children of our father in heaven and well that we are never so „broken“ as we feel. We cannot loose all hope or all our ability to forgive, because our father in heaven who is hope and forgiveness created us In his own image. There is something within us that can never be destroyed however the conditions under which we live are. But what do we do if we cannot see it that little spark of hope? In this case we must have trust that it still is there.

I saw some wonderful advice on how to change a habit online (I think somewhere on the website „art of manliness“ which I highly recommend... also for women). What can I do if I want to change a habit? Let’s say I am a coach potatoe and I want to start moving my body more and enjoy it. I just act like the person I want to be. I just start moving my body more and with time it becomes a habit.
The same is true for hope and forgiveness. If I just act like a person who is hopeful and forgiving it will come to me as a habit.

Hope it was at least a bit helpful. Take care!
 
I am noise sensitive.
My neighbour is drunk and yelling.

I cant do anything because if i do i will get in trouble. I cant confront him or it will be trouble. I just want silence...peaceful night.

The mind takes me to ideas on how to silence him...

I am hiding in my room.
I emerge here with you all and feel little better.


(Brain creates visual of hurting him... just want quiet please)
 
I am noise sensitive.
My neighbour is drunk and yelling.

I cant do anything because if i do i wil...

I have a neighbor that often turns his music on at night and it's so loud it drives me crazy. I need it rather silent at night because I'm an insomniac as it is. So I asked him once during the day and explained to him he was keeping me up every night. I've only had to ask once again since. If I would have said something when it was happening... it would have been a fight.

If not that, can you call the police and let them handle him. That's what they do. I know ear plugs don't really work for me, but would they work for you?

I hope you have a better day, and can find a resolution for next time.
 
Hello @Snowflakes, I love your picture of that beautiful Christmas tree btw.
L...


That was in fact quite poignant. What lovely advice! I have put this into practice myself a few times. I call it "fake it until you make it". I've accomplished several things using this method.

Regarding the rest of your sentiment, very insightful. I certainly didn't see anything resembling poor advice in anything you wrote!
 
@Never_falter Thank you for your kind thoughts to me, I truly cherish them. My avatar goes hand-in-hand with my user-name (snowflakes). I find my peace in nature during the winter snow up in the mountains.

My therapist has me going to open AA meetings. At first I couldn’t understand why because I don’t drink and neither does my sufferer. She told me to simply go and listen to their stories. I attend a small group that was gracious enough to allow me to listen. It was, and is, and incredible experience to hear them speak about God, hope, forgiveness, and trust. All things that you spoke about to me.

It’s difficult @Never_falter probably because I’m just tired of picking myself up off the floor after another round of being blamed for everything bad in her life and being accused of things I haven’t done. There must still be those embers of hope and forgiveness dimly glowing within me because, after 11 years, I haven’t walked out the front door.

I have bookmarked your post because It came from your heart and I will read it often when I need help picking myself up again.

Thank you :hug:
 
¡Stupid man! Woke me up again and I could not go back to sleep, so I am being here and have been reading a book and internet surfing and at 0530 I have to raise again. It is already 0250 over here. Stupid man!
 
Such a stupid habit of mine. When I cannot sleep I start reading and chatting and whatever...
And then I notice it is nearly time to get up. Hubby gets up at 5:30 every day... just soooo early... which we could get more sleep...
 
I have a neighbor that often turns his music on at night and it's so loud it drives me crazy. I need i...

I did call the police.
They came and checked it out.
They came to me also.
Police said your neighbour is drunk playing foosball with friends. It is not a domestic violence and there are no safety concerns.

They will likely be loud for a while. They are drunk.
Please callback if things get out of control.

I thought it over later...
If i was not disabled and hyper alert sensitive i probably would not mind. Ironically now i am the one they may call cops on.

I really need to get this noise and reactive emotions under control before i get a goose marker and spray his wall with blood. I would stand and wait for police or just go home and sleep. Scary part is that when i am triggerred i could see myself hurt the source of noise or irritant. Sacrifice myself my freedom for split second control of gaining peace.
 
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