Realized My Biggest Trigger

[squireparty]

I had an appointment with my counselor last week where she mentioned that I might want to think of what my biggest triggers over the years were and how I might find ways to avoid them. So I have been thinking - honestly making an effort to go back into the past and find a common theme. I seem to have come across a strong common theme. One of my biggies is I can't deal well with situations in which I am behind a counter of some kind waiting on people, or customers, with no idea of what I am doing and the expectation that I act like I have it together. There is probably a more concise way to put this perhaps but even thinking of this pumps up my heart some.

How to avoid this? I'm realizing more and more self employment may be the path for me as in a few of my last jobs I had often been in the above situation, and it's not something I can handle very well at all.

Is anyone else out there relating to this?

 

[WillyKat]

I've had a somewhat similar realization recently. One of my big triggers is being watched or monitored. Obviously, *nobody* likes it, but for me it's a bit worse as it triggers me every time. Unfortunately for me, my newish job has a lot of watching and monitoring built in.

So now that I've finally found a job where I don't have to commute an hour each way, I realize I sort of hate it because of the watching and my anxiety is there nearly every day.

I've often dreamt of changing my work to being entirely self-employed and work from home. It's something I simply have to look into. I'd love to be able to say:

look, I'll come into the office when I feel the need to interact with people, but I'll work at home when I feel that's best for me. That's the deal,
take it or leave it, I don't care what your work at home rules are.

I dunno how feasible that is, but that's I think what I need.

 

[PearBlossom]

Well, squire party--there are plenty of jobs that have you working for other people and not in that position. I've only had maybe two jobs in my life where I stood behind a counter. And being in a position of not knowing anything and having to be on point to act like you do--well, you just don't take jobs like that. I'm not sure I've ever had a job like that--where I had to attempt to fake knowledge. I had lots of jobs where I didn't know much and I learned a lot, but I never had to pretend to be something I wasn't. I hope you find that. Self-employment is really hard and stressful. I'd really rather go back to working for others, to be honest.

WillyKat--yours would be a lot harder because there is watching/monitoring with everything--sometimes even when you're self-employed depending on the work.