sun seeker
Diamond Member
Something strange came to mind recently and I wonder if anyone has any ideas about it.
For a while now I've been gradually remembering childhood trauma, some of which involves sexual abuse. I just noticed something after working on some of these memories in therapy. Even though I get detailed sensory memories of what pretty obviously was sexual abuse, these memories completely leave out the lower half of my body. I can feel things like being crushed, unable to breathe, the terror and disbelief, the feel of the ground under me, etc. But everything I remember is in the upper half of my body. It's as if the lower half wasn't even there. I get very brief flashes - impressions - of what must have happened, but there is no sensory memory to it at all.
Any ideas on why? I know we can leave our bodies during trauma, and indeed I see some of this from above. But when I'm feeling it, it's as if only my top half can feel anything at all. Can we blank out part of the body to avoid pain? Or am I maybe just not ready to remember? Just wondering.
For a while now I've been gradually remembering childhood trauma, some of which involves sexual abuse. I just noticed something after working on some of these memories in therapy. Even though I get detailed sensory memories of what pretty obviously was sexual abuse, these memories completely leave out the lower half of my body. I can feel things like being crushed, unable to breathe, the terror and disbelief, the feel of the ground under me, etc. But everything I remember is in the upper half of my body. It's as if the lower half wasn't even there. I get very brief flashes - impressions - of what must have happened, but there is no sensory memory to it at all.
Any ideas on why? I know we can leave our bodies during trauma, and indeed I see some of this from above. But when I'm feeling it, it's as if only my top half can feel anything at all. Can we blank out part of the body to avoid pain? Or am I maybe just not ready to remember? Just wondering.
