Regression anybody?

[FirstTimer]

hello everybody!

I am feeling a bit frustrated with myself after a bit of regression with my symptoms the last two going on three weeks.

I was doing really well - the best I have been post-trauma. While some days were rocky, I was mostly able to navigate with the occasional really bad day that the person I go see was able to help me work through.

And then, all of a sudden, I’ve regressed. I guess I was “triggered” badly and symptoms are going from 0-10 in an instant and appearing in new ways (ex - waking up middle of night or first thing in the morning already in full panic mode).

While I manage the smaller stuff fairly well, I’m struggling when I get to a ten as I can’t really bring myself back. Everything I know goes out the window and I’m just reliving the trauma again.

Anyways - my question. Anybody else experience moderate regression? I’m disappointed in myself, and HATED having to tell the person i see that I wasn’t doing wel. ALL this time. So many tools. She’s been incredible and I am/was SO much better. And now .... here I am - backsliding several weeks.

Have you experienced this? How do you make it stop? How do you push yourself forward again? Will I be able to get back to where I was and continue my progress ? My poor person has got to be so tired of me - I know I am!

 

[somerandomguy]

Oh em jee, yes. I am the king of regression.

But I think this is really something everyone with PTSD goes through. Symptoms disappear - sometimes for years - and then suddenly it all comes roaring back.

That's why we're doing the work. The work gives us tools to get back up on the horse after we fall off. Ideally, we get up a little faster than before - but not always. There is, unfortunately, no straight line to healing.

Try to give yourself a break. Self-compassion is really one of the best tools you can use when you regress. It's not your fault. You didn't choose to regress. You're doing everything you can do right now.

 

[EveHarrington]

It’s not regression, it’s par for the course.

PTSD healing is NEVER linear. It’s always up/down....a bit to the side....flipped upside down, etc.

It helps to understand the nature of healing this disorder as if you think of it as regression you’ll be needlessly beating yourself up for something that is 100% expected and natural in your healing journey.

 

[Friday]

PTSD is a cyclic disorder, and extremely responsive to stress. So not only does it tend to cycle for no damn good reason except that’s just what it does, but any kind of stressor or loss/change in coping mechanism will also cause symptoms to ramp back up, again.

The Stress Cup does a really good job at conceptualing that part of the process.

 

[shimmerz]

I have put into place what I refer to as positive triggers that help me to come out of a regressed state.
Coffee is one of them. Grows me up instantly.
Driving my car is another. Makes me completely grown up.
Cooking. Ditto.
Aromatherapy. I use Lemongrass to clear up a regression.

Other things too but these are my go to's when I recognize that I need to pull out of a regressed state.

 

[lovak]

I'm just going to hang out here in case there are more tips for getting out of regression. As I'm currently doing my best not to get worse.
Thanks @shimmerz for mentioning coffee. I've been sitting in the same chair for hours wondering when I'm going to get up to empty my bladder, but now I want coffee so I'm going to get up.

 

[shimmerz]

sitting in the same chair for hours wondering when I'm going to get up to empty my bladder,

I wonder if checking out freeze states would be good for you. I am just basing that on the quote above. I had a really difficult time (understatement) of freeze states.

I ended up helping myself through that by focusing on moving my index finger, then thumb, then the rest of my fingers, then wrist (pretty sure you get where I am going with this). When I focused on trying to move my whole body it was overwhelmingly difficult and it seemed like it was actually feeding the freeze.

Pete Walker has some good information on the freeze state as I recall. You will find some stuff on it in this site too.
Pete Walker, M.A. Psychotherapy
Just scroll down on this page and see if the freeze response stuff resonates with you at all.

Sorry you are going through this. I know how difficult it is.

 

[lovak]

@shimmerz Thank you for that article. I don't really know what to say. I've been in 'flight state' for years, but it completely burned me out and yeah, the freeze state describes me pretty well now. But I'm still switching between freeze/flight.

I need to think about this. It's really insightful. Thank you

 

[shimmerz]

Yeah, I sent you to Pete Walker because he talks a bunch about how freeze/flight/fight/fawn states can be intertwined at the same time, which seems counter intuitive but is real.

We could be in freeze and flight or whatever at the same time. He is an excellent resource. I hope some of his content can help you.

 

[Kaleidoscope]

hello everybody!

I am feeling a bit frustrated with myself after a bit of regression with my symptoms the last two going on three weeks.

I was doing really well - the best I have been post-trauma. While some days were rocky, I was mostly able to navigate with the occasional really bad day that the person I go see was able to help me work through.

And then, all of a sudden, I’ve regressed. I guess I was “triggered” badly and symptoms are going from 0-10 in an instant and appearing in new ways (ex - waking up middle of night or first thing in the morning already in full panic mode).

While I manage the smaller stuff fairly well, I’m struggling when I get to a ten as I can’t really bring myself back. Everything I know goes out the window and I’m just reliving the trauma again.

Anyways - my question. Anybody else experience moderate regression? I’m disappointed in myself, and HATED having to tell the person i see that I wasn’t doing wel. ALL this time. So many tools. She’s been incredible and I am/was SO much better. And now .... here I am - backsliding several weeks.

Have you experienced this? How do you make it stop? How do you push yourself forward again? Will I be able to get back to where I was and continue my progress ? My poor person has got to be so tired of me - I know I am!

Hello,

I’ve come to realize that I may have ‘triggers’ when I least expect them off and on throughout my life.

I had “graduated” from therapy, I was doing well...sleeping all night, a return of a familiar energy.

And then a reminder came my way. Two nights later I woke in a panic and wanting to leave this world permanently. I do not remember the dream, if that’s what awakened me. I held the face of my granddaughter in my mind for an hour before I dared to get up.
My first response was “oh no! It’s hapoening again!! All the work I have done in therapy! I have failed!”

The last thing I wanted to do was limp back to my counselor. I looked for other options. I may have even wrote about it here...

After 2 months, I went back to my therapist. That was a year ago...

He was kind. And we started again.

What I’ve realized and now accept, is that this may happen again, off and on through out the rest of my life. And it has...

When it does, I take special care of myself. I’ve learned to reach out to a few trusted friends & share without details that I’m having a difficult day. (It took me years to learn how to trust, how to carefully share.) I have a friend who offers a walk almost every day. She is respectful, does not probe and shares her struggles too...we are able to support each other.
I gauge how I’m doing by my sleep pattern.

Right now I am in the midst of a major “trigger”. It all came back a few weeks ago, as if it was yesterday.

My therapist has encouraged me to ‘sit with it’, “lean into the pain”. (My typical coping response had been to get very busy and outward focused.)

What I have realized this time is that I had been “leaning in” with gritted teeth and an “I can’t stand this.” mindset.

I have been trying to be be more compassionate to myself as I let the pain wash through.
And on occasion this will lead to a few tears, which have been hiding deep within for years.
I welcome moist eyes and wish I could break into a torrent of tears, a shower of relief...
Be compassionate with yourselves everyone... There is no right or wrong in healing or how long it takes.

Find the joy that still exists... I welcome anything that gives me relief right now.
Soon, in a few hours, I will join others and share a smile that I hope will be also felt in my heart...focusing out is good whenever possible, especially if it shares joy with another.
Question: Has anyone ever experienced delayed responses to triggers?
At first, I will feel ok and in charge. I will sleep well and my energy will maintain...and then in a few days, like a descending fog, difficult and too familiar emotions start to take over.
Sometimes I have had a sudden drop in my blood pressure and heart rate that leaves me weak and clammy for an hour or more. A trip to the ER rules out anything serious.

I am wondering if this is part of a freeze response?
And is it common to be delayed a few days from the initial trigger?

Thank you to anyone who has read all of this... And I hope the original poster (First Timer?) of this ‘thread’ is finding answers.

You are not alone. We are never alone. We need to reach out and hopefully find a kind and trustworthy tender soul...and if it can’t be in your life right now, I believe you can find it in this forum. I am slowly finding tender souls in my midst and today I am so very grateful for all of you.

 

[lovak]

I had my body response with low bloodpressure to a trigger hours and hours earlier. My body responded because my mind couldnt, if that makes sense. Its been three days and Im still waiting for the mental blow.

But usually when I get triggered I immediatly response.

 

[Kaleidoscope]

Thank you Lovak...

I'm just going to hang out here in case there are more tips for getting out of regression. As I'm currently doing my best not to get worse.
Thanks @shimmerz for mentioning coffee. I've been sitting in the same chair for hours wondering when I'm going to get up to empty my bladder, but now I want coffee so I'm going to get up.

Hello Lovak, I have an assortment of photos that I make cards with. Some are of children, some are beautiful sunsets or sunrises, flowers, large bodies of water...I try to capture moments with my camera when I have had a trigger with that slow slide down, I start making cards.
I know it’s best to “sit with it”, however I cannot do this 24/7...I need a break and refocusing on this little hobby of mine helps immensely. ?