I've been struggling lately a lot about my last relationship. With the respect that I keep harping on myself about how If I could have always done the right thing or acted the right way I would be still in a relationship with my girlfriend. A little back story my ex girlfriend suffered from past complex trauma from her children and also had been in a abusive relationship before we got together. She eventually began to feel triggered around me and pulled away.
I know I'm human and I can't be perfect but I wanted to be for her so badly. Now I look back on my moments that I wasn't exactly what she needed and feel deep remorse about it. I start to point at those times and say these are the reasons she left and you weren't a good partner.
I still love her, but that relationship did take its toll on me and I felt exhausted most times from it. I made me feel like I was walking a tight rope so she wouldn't be trigger or get upset. It definitely made me feel like I had to give up some of my boundaries like good communication to be with her.
I know I'm human and I can't be perfect but I wanted to be for her so badly. Now I look back on my moments that I wasn't exactly what she needed and feel deep remorse about it. I start to point at those times and say these are the reasons she left and you weren't a good partner.
I still love her, but that relationship did take its toll on me and I felt exhausted most times from it. I made me feel like I was walking a tight rope so she wouldn't be trigger or get upset. It definitely made me feel like I had to give up some of my boundaries like good communication to be with her.