Self Care = Major Anxiety

[Tinyflame]

I was thinking @CrowFeather , I have the same issue. But what really was a big lightbulb for me today was I guess an understanding, that for whatever cumulative reasons I have a very sensitive (or something?) nervous system. Very sensitive, but not 'overly sensitive' in that I am bothered with things anyone would be; the difference is they flatten me. Intuitively perhaps, lately I've been removing uncomfortable clothing/ tags, hanging around in darkened rooms, though not ideal taking Neo Citran to try to sleep, getting out of the (painful) cold, & mostly reducing toxic exposure of people, news etc,

I remembered too, adding positive/ hopeful exposure helped before.

Perhaps a backdoor approach of such small types of things (except for the Neo Citran) could be a place to start without being too triggering?

Best wishes to you. :hug:

 

[Crow]

Thanks @Junebug . Good thoughrs. I have so much faulty wiring around self care (keeping a clean house, looking nice, eating, hell...even bathing) that I think this is almost like exposure therapy. I think my system can finally tolerate the stressors enough to do the tasks to a degree of completion, and the freeze aftermath will lessen and lessen. Last week I was out of commission for several days. Today I was functional by about 3pm. It's an improvement. And I got more done yesterday. I think this makes sense.

 

[Tinyflame]

Yes it totally makes sense & I think really is exposure therapy. I don't come across many people who find self-affirmations nearly fatal, but it's shocking how the mind (or ptsd one) can derail & self-sabotage.

But it's also shocking how repeated small good things can make an indent.

Baby steps. :tup: :)

 

[papillon]

I can definitely relate to this. I've always looked at it as my brain being exhausted by trying to exercise healthy behaviors it isn't used to. They say the brain is plastic (capable of creating new neural pathways), but it isn't easy. Our old behaviors (and PTSD related shenanigans) are deeply ingrained in our brains. It's hard work to rewire your brain! My therapist describes it as a wagon wheel that is stuck in a rut. It's possible to get the wagon out and create a new path, but it's hard work!

 

[ms spock]

They say the brain is plastic (capable of creating new neural pathways), but it isn't easy. Our old behaviors (and PTSD related shenanigans) are deeply ingrained in our brains. It's hard work to rewire your brain! My therapist describes it as a wagon wheel that is stuck in a rut. It's possible to get the wagon out and create a new path, but it's hard work!

Hell yes! I am doing it myself and it takes a lot of concentration, a lot of focus and an enormous amount of discipline.

Worth it but really challenging to do at times.

 

[ms spock]

In Kristin Neff's book there is detail about the about the blow back that can sometimes happen when someone begins self compassion. It can be fierce.

 

[Laurie McLaughlin]

Hi there -

I have CPTSD and have had trouble sleeping too -

Regular meditation works for me but you said it does not work for you - but you can try walking meditation which combines movement and learning to work on calming the mind -

I know Qi Gong also works for me because it deals with moving stuck energy around and I find that useful

Taking a bath makes me sleepy

What about physical activity - for me that can help - it helps me feel better about myself and tires out my body

Hoping you find peace -

Laurie