Self compassion - Therapist Wants This Worked On Before Trauma Processing

[LucyLou]

Anyone else suck at this?
This is what my therapist is telling me that I need to work on, before getting into any trauma work because she doesn't think I'm ready for it.
I don't even know where to start with any of it
What does self compassion mean to you?

 

[Movingforward10]

Anyone else suck at this?
This is what my therapist is telling me that I need to work on, before getting into any trauma work because she doesn't think I'm ready for it.
I don't even know where to start with any of it
What does self compassion mean to you?

It's so hard, isn't it.

For me it is:.
Forgiving myself, if I need to.
Not blaming myself.
Treating myself with the same respect I would treat someone else. The same measures of behaviour and the same level of empathy.
Nurturing myself. Giving myself virtual hugs and positivity.
Telling myself positive messages as opposed to negative ones.

 

[Friday]

You disgusting filthy slut!!! <<< Not what you’d scream at a child, or rape victim sobbing and bloody in your arms, or stranger on the street, right?

So learning not to scream it at yourself? Pretty. Durn. Vital.

 

[whiteraven]

For me, it's at least initially about recognizing and stopping the negative self-talk. And...

Forgiving myself, if I need to.
Not blaming myself.
Treating myself with the same respect I would treat someone else. The same measures of behaviour and the same level of empathy.
Nurturing myself. Giving myself virtual hugs and positivity.
Telling myself positive messages as opposed to negative ones.

 

[Freddyt]

What does self compassion mean to you?

Exactly what it says - compassion for yourself. Because I didn't give myself PTSD.....

....so nothing that results from PTSD is my fault.

.....and that half the sh$t I do that's frustrating - is really funny........learn to laugh at yourself, and that it's not embarrassing - it's funny. (when you end up with OJ on your hash browns and ketchup in your OJ glass.......)

 

[hypervigilant]

Yes forgiving myself for trusting others, for not trusting my gut, for seeing the best in those that treated me the worst, for believing I was the bad one for so long.
Swamped in toxic shame and guilt that was never mine to bear.

 

[somerandomguy]

It was helpful for me to figure out exactly WHAT I needed to forgive myself for. Not for being abused. Not for the run up to being abused. Those things weren't my choice and ultimately had little to nothing to do with me. What I needed to forgive myself for was treating other people badly in the wake of my untreated PTSD. I also needed to forgive myself for being so horribly mean to myself. No one deserves to go through trauma and then tell themselves it was all their fault, and if they had been a better person none of it would have happened.