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Sex As A Coping Tool?

  • Post starter Post starter Ymoyhw
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Healthy women don't enjoy sex with men they don't know.
This generalization is ridiculous. I'm not sure how it's defensible with any fact or statistic. So I'll assume you meant it as pure opinion.

In your opinion, 'healthy women' don't enjoy sex with men they don't know.
 
Once upon a time on the environment of evolutionary adaptation, there were an equal number of woman who liked sex with strangers and women who liked sex with monogamous partners. The women who had sex with strangers became pregnant, and with no committed partner to invest resources, their offspring (and the zipless-f*ck genes) died out.

The women who hated casual sex and only mated with men who showed serious intentions also became pregnant. Their offspring were well fed on bison and wildebeest by the cave "husband" who helped provide shelter and defend mother and children from danger. These children (and their don't-have-sex-if-he-doesn't-take-you-on five-dates genes) survived, grew up, and had more babies.

And that is why women don't masturbate to close up shots of the opposite sex's genitalia they see on the internet, but men do.

The end.
 
but methinks in those days sex was a pretty private affair and men did most of the choosing except in some fabulously opposite minded Polynesian islands.
Children were raised by the women in the tribe and the men provided for the whole tribe not just their partner/s.
It's when the provisions stopped being shared equally that the troubles began and the tribes broke up into couples who lived in lonely separate huts and the appearances of the huts became important to show who was a better provider.
The weaker members died of starvation and no one was as happy as they were before, but they learned to take pills so the other hut people would never know that secretly they felt sad and missed the old days.
Eventually they developed a pill to take so that everyone could feel a bit happier without actually being happy. Nobody really liked anyone any more, least of all themselves!
Some people got very disillusioned and decided to make their own rules and snuck out at night to meet the others who missed the old tribe. Sometimes they had sex together to try to get rid of the lonely feeling, but it didn't really work.
So they invented the Internet where they could speak anonymously to each other through the air and hopefully be more honest.
sometimes that worked and sometimes it didn't
The End.
 
I can hardly comprehend this post, much less agree with it, but this is pretty good:
Sometimes they had sex together to try to get rid of the lonely feeling, but it didn't really work.
So they invented the Internet where they could speak anonymously to each other through the air and hopefully be more honest.
sometimes that worked and sometimes it didn't
 
Once upon a time

So, yes. Total fairytale. As actually studying the archeological record indicates most societies we can genotype did the exact opposite for a good 60,000 years, or so. The records we have for how societies arranged themselves is painfully anorexic, although it's still enough to know that judeo-christian social constructs are just that. Constructs. And fairly modern ones. We hairless beach apes are adaptable bastards. We've built hundreds of civilizations, many with polar opposite rules and standards of behavior / culture. The genographic record is pretty clear, however; we have a rich and varied genome, and it's far more common for siblings not to share parents, than the other way around. Which means however the society organized itself? If monogamous relationships were prized? It was serial monogamy. Like modern marry & divorce & remarry cultures.

Are there differences between men & women? Absolutely. Vive la différence. Some are biological, some are cultural.

Going against ones on culture is a difficult thing to do. I came of age in a culture which is extremely relaxed and open about sex. That's where I did the majority of my f*cking around. Living here, in the US? Pfft. Neither sanctimonious puritanical & libertine offshoot groups really appeal. But it's the culture I live in, at present. So I cope as best I can.

You say you were a feminist once who believed women could...

I'm not a feminist, at least no more than 'the radical belief that women are people'. I don't think that women can do everything men can, nor do I believe that men can do everything women can. AND the inverse; just because A man can do something, doesn't mean all men can -or even have the inclination- to do something, nor that just because A woman can do something that all women can. Are there differences between the sexes? For sure. But individuals always vary.

I am a woman who has done most of what you once believed women could do, and now believe no women can do. I am not alone. Hardly the majority, but not some special little snowflake, either. I don't speak for all women. I don't give a damn about empowerment or any other "go sister go" kind of cause. I only speak for myself. I've done what I've done not to further the advancement of women, but because those decisions were right for me, at the time, and I was lucky enough to be able to choose them. As a person... They suited me right down to the ground.

When we get down to brass tacks it doesn't really matter to me if women in Tibet have multiple husbands, women in Tehran can't share a cab with a man who isn't their husband, women in the _______tribe (modern day, mind blanking, will look up) function as the rulers, while the old men raise the grand babies (What IS it about old men & little kids? They do both seem to have the same kind if joyful heart.), and the parents do neither the ruling nor raising as our culture's parents do, much less what the Etruscans or Lascaux or Xia, or Jōmon, or any other peoples did ... If I'm living in the US in 2016, want 1 husband, but am taking a cab with 2 men I don't know, to go raise my own child. I'm hardly alone, though. Both historically and presently. I'm not doing anything new or special. My life is my own. If I'm lucky, it's what I want to make of it.

Black and white, though, this world isn't.
 
And that is why women don't masturbate to close up shots of the opposite sex's genitalia they see on the internet, but men do.

Another generalization thats wrong. Myself as well as many HEALTHY women I know enjoy porn, including my step sister whom has zero trauma, was a product of sex with a stranger by a 16 yr old mother, and whom had a wonderful raising and a brother a few years later so there goes the other generalization.
 
Seto, your stepmother getting pregnant at 16 to a stranger would not have been the stress free lovely situation you paint.
Your stepmother must have had a lot of support from family to be able to do that, and still it would have been difficult. Most 16 year olds in that situation don't get to keep their babies - it's abortion or adoption - two traumatic things that women in her shoes usually experience.
I should know, I was one.
It's ridiculous to argue that women don't have to be careful with sex. The effects upon a woman are huge - whether or not you enjoy porn is besides the point!
 
Your stepmother must have had a lot of support from family to be able to do that

Actually she didnt, she was the embarassment of the town. Her family very faithful southern baptist.

Most 16 year olds in that situation don't get to keep their babies - it's abortion or adoption

What year are you living in? We have three shows, 16 and preg and Teen Mom and Teen Mom 2. No, not all of those teen moms have good (or any) support system nor do all have dads that care.

Yes, abortion and adoption is an option but not the main ones now in 2016.

Yes, being a teen mom is hard however there are MANY that keep their babies and finish high school, go to college, go to work at a good carrer; all while being a single mom with no support. Hard but it happens.

Making generalizations as you are...are just not correct.

It's ridiculous to argue that women don't have to be careful with sex.

I did not say they dont have to be careful with sex. Those words never entered my keyboard. I said HEALTHY woman CAN enjoy sex with a stranger, enjoy porn, and have babies by themselves; using my step sister as an example of a HEATHY woman.
 
So how does a 16 year d with no emotional, financial or family support look after a child? And also as u say continue with school? Those programs you talk of have family support, or at least the boyfriend hanging in there.
I'm not sure what world you're living in, but what you say is simply not possible.
 
So how does a 16 year d with no emotional, financial or family support look after a child? And also as u say continue with school? Those programs you talk of have family support, or at least the boyfriend hanging in there.
I'm not sure what world you're living in, but what you say is simply not possible.
Not to mention the massive damage done to future romantic prospects. How do quality men view a college age girl with a walking, talking five year old and no husband? Hmmm.
 
So how does a 16 year d with no emotional, financial or family support look after a child?

Parents that emotionally werent there. Good grief, you are taking my words and twisting them! You are making a generalization and its not correct.

I had a friend that was on her own, with a child, as a an emancipated teenage. She lived on goverment assistance (welfair) until she could get on her feet.

Yes, it is possible!

How do quality men view a college age girl with a walking, talking five year old and no husband?

It's ridiculous statements such as that that make women not feel they are worthy enough to be a wife.

I am NOT advising that teens should go out and get pregnant nor am I saying its ok for a teen to get pregnant. I am saying its not the death sentence you are making it out to be.

I used my step sister as an example as a healthy woman and you twist my words and throw it back.

I said HEALTHY woman CAN enjoy sex with a stranger, enjoy porn, and have babies by themselves; using my step sister as an example of a HEATHY woman.

I will re-advise that!
 
I don't think a "quality" man would take offence to that, but teenagers do not raise children on their own without family or government welfare support. It's not possible
If they think they do, they're oblivious to what is being handed out to them - and that level of entitlement is not an attractive quality.
 
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