Should I Quit Guitar

[Deleted member 27340]

Should I quit my guitar lessons because my teacher is a middle-aged man and I'm afraid of being alone with middle-aged and elder men, and the room the lessons usually are in feels so locked of? Or would that be limiting my life unnecessarily much because of my anxiety?

 

[Deleted member 28403]

Well, if that is the situation, there are two options, whether you can deal with it or not.

If you don't know try, if you are able to deal with it it will maybe even help you with your symptoms, as the fear might go away from seeing that the person won't harm you.

 

[Justmehere]

The thing about PTSD is that the more we avoid, the worse things tend to get. If you go, it could be a form of self-administered exposure therapy. It could actually help your anxiety to lessen over the long run. Plus, you get to learn guitar, which is another way to reduce anxiety over the long haul.

If you don't go, you could find another guitar instructor who is female and/or in a more desirable location. Then you would still be able to learn guitar and have that outlet.

 

[Anarchy]

Is the anxiety affecting your learning?

also, is he giving off any creepy signals?
If the answer to either of those is "yes!" see about finding a new teacher.

If the answer is no, Would it be possible to take a friend allong who is willing to sit in the room with you and the teacher, or would it be possible to hold the lesson in a more open place?

 

[zeropoint]

I would suggest looking for a new teacher/space before quitting altogether. That is, if you enjoy the lessons otherwise.

If you still want to stay with your current teacher, is there at least another place you could meet?

 

[The Albatross]

If you enjoy the guitar, express your misgivings about your classes being in a place that is uncomfortable. It took me a good long while to learn the difference between my anxiety and my instincts. But... Trauma, there is always (generally) another way to address anxiety without depriving yourself of something you care about (music).

 

[arfie]

I am pure hedonist when it comes to my musical instruments. I do what feels good and avoid what does not feel good. It doesn't even have to feel bad. Just "not good" is enough to get me gone. Feel good is why I play.

Butttttttaaaaa....

Mastering a challenge is on my "feel good list." In a case like you are describing, I might see fit to challenge myself to find the fun in it. Maybe challenge a stereotype or two??? Maybe. Might. I don't know the full chemistry of what you are working with.

Please, please, pretty please with silk and steel strings on top, please don't quit guitar. Musical instruments are great therapy!!!

 

[Anarchy]

Musical instruments are great therapy!!!

@Trauma You said you were still going climbing, are you still doing martial arts too? they're really good.

 

[Friday]

Speaking as someone who has hit a few people a few times with guitars... It's a much better weapon than a piano to learn to play. ;) Also, one generally sits facing the instructor. Which makes it easy to kick them in the face.

Just thinking pragmatically.

 

[anthony]

Or would that be limiting my life unnecessarily much because of my anxiety?

You have to look at the reality versus paranoia. Has this person done anything to warrant the anxiety? If not (paranoia)... then it is you who has to deal with your anxiety. If he has done something (reality), then being proactive in getting out of there is a solid solution to avoid a possible catastrophe later.

 

[Neverthesame]

You can also teach yourself how to play the guitar. Best part about that is. You don't have to play any songs you don't want to and you can learn at your leisure. Just a thought anyway. I have always believed music is one of the most beautiful forms of art, something to be enjoyed. Lessons can be helpful but they are not mandatory. Don't know if that's helpful for you or not, but I wish you luck with whatever you choose to do.