- Post starter
- #13
J
just me here
still getting out of bed everyday. I am actually taking a month off, but it is time away from my counselor. We get so tied up in the work of getting better that we forget just how much work it really is and forget that some time off is important too.
Today I woke up ill with a flu my wife has shared with me, so I get a day to sit and clear out some cobwebs between sleeping and frequent trips to other rooms in the house. Do some reading and sleeping and maybe some music. And feeling sick, so it goes.
I have pretty much ruled out the possibility of taking any time off in a ward of any kind, but still dreaming of hooking up the boat, loading up the truck and being on lakes undetermined for awhile fishing and just being away and trying to remember what being responsible only to myself and my wife was like way back in the dim past. Our oldest child is 25 now, we have 3 and within 4 more years we will have zero legal or financial ties to any of them. 30 years is enough time to totally forget how to do something, I am thinking I need to remember what it was like to live alone and have no drama, no effects from anyone but me on my life.
I think having a hope for a future that is better than my present will give me the power to get over this last hill. Right now, it is hard to think of being anything but what I am now and have been for 25 years, hard to imagine change, hard to see a new path outside my rut.
Today I woke up ill with a flu my wife has shared with me, so I get a day to sit and clear out some cobwebs between sleeping and frequent trips to other rooms in the house. Do some reading and sleeping and maybe some music. And feeling sick, so it goes.
I have pretty much ruled out the possibility of taking any time off in a ward of any kind, but still dreaming of hooking up the boat, loading up the truck and being on lakes undetermined for awhile fishing and just being away and trying to remember what being responsible only to myself and my wife was like way back in the dim past. Our oldest child is 25 now, we have 3 and within 4 more years we will have zero legal or financial ties to any of them. 30 years is enough time to totally forget how to do something, I am thinking I need to remember what it was like to live alone and have no drama, no effects from anyone but me on my life.
I think having a hope for a future that is better than my present will give me the power to get over this last hill. Right now, it is hard to think of being anything but what I am now and have been for 25 years, hard to imagine change, hard to see a new path outside my rut.
