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Social avoidance and self esteem

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You rose because you are strong! And it sounds like you are a fighter, pushing yourself towards not letting these issues control your life. And it is possible. You have a keen sense of awareness of when the symptoms are getting to you, which is proof of your growth. Keep growing and moving forward by reaching back into your toolbox of coping skills. Allow yourself some time to process symptoms, perhaps use things like journaling, calming techniques, etc to rise yet again. I wish PTSD had a cure, but it doesn't, at least not yet. But you have found the secret to living with it. KUDOS to you for that! Prayers for continued strength, wisdom and faith in yourself to keep rising!
 
You rose because you are strong! And it sounds like you are a fighter, pushing yourself towards not letting these issues control your life. And it is possible. You have a keen sense of awareness of when the symptoms are getting to you, which is proof of your growth. Keep growing and moving forward by reaching back into your toolbox of coping skills. Allow yourself some time to process symptoms, perhaps use things like journaling, calming techniques, etc to rise yet again. I wish PTSD had a cure, but it doesn't, at least not yet. But you have found the secret to living with it. KUDOS to you for that! Prayers for continued strength, wisdom and faith in yourself to keep rising!
I'm rising again fast and this time I can see clearer what's happening. A lot of little things contribute to it, but this one seems to be the most important and powerful. Embracing everything, embracing the low state just as it is, paradoxically it shifts when I embrace it. Truly embracing it all, I see it differently and i just naturally do the right things, take the right steps and transcend it. Not all in one go, its gradually and subtly as a process
 
There's a book by Thich That Hanh called Fear. He says that all human fear can be traced back to what he calls Primordial fear which develops when we leave the womb. It's the fear of separation. And the fear of death is one in the same thing as this.

I would disagree here. Why would you fear death since it is the only guarantee we have in our lifetime? It’s coming some way and some how. There is nothing you can do to stop it. Embrace it and hope you lived a full life when it comes. Many things are far worse than dying.
 
I been feeling a lot of social anxiety and I see it comes from a feeling of unworthiness triggered by not overcoming the fear that came on when PTSD symptoms created a big challenge. I've fallen into this low place and risen out of it lots of times but I don't consciously understand how ive risen out of it in the past.

I can see the ideas and mental programs that are making me want to avoid. I remember I was real helpless and in need of help when the symptoms hit their peak. This memory comes into my head and I feel unworthy to be around people.

The fear of death is the same fear of being rejected by others, I see that now.
Hey, I hope you feel better now. I find for me what really works is getting out of (i use the phrase to refer to orientation around me ihsan not in a self punishing way) "self-centred ness". Working on my empathy and helping others around me actually helps me to start feel better about myself and I feel less ashamed. This is on top of the very therapuetic techniques I have learned such as journalling, talking, meditation, and interacting with people who i consider COMPASSIONATE as much as possible. It is probably from being around warm loving people in adulthood my social anxiety naturally has calmed down though I have ptsd which brings up the social anxiety again... mainly when I see people who remind me of my past (uncompassionate). I hope this helps.
 
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