Society's View Of Ptsd

[maddog]

Prime-No eludes to an observation I have made about the so-called "mental health" community as well. Speaking in what I acknowledge are generalisations, it seems that most people fit into one of two camps - those who carefully and deliberately choose to conceal or withhold details of their illness from all but a select few (if any) outsiders, and those who seem to have swung to the other extreme and tend to announce the details to the world at large, almost as though they have come to internalise their illness as the singular "thing" that defines them and as the core component of their identity. It's almost as though we as humans grapple with the struggle between being ashamed of what has happened to us/what we are experiencing, and being proud of, or defined, by it.

Sadly, I fear that either extreme is a struggle, both for the sufferer and for those in their vicinity. Secrecy and denial only serve to perpetuate the stigma and isolation that we all know so well, as well as alienate and misinform the community and reinforce the view that it is indeed something shameful to be hidden and denied wherever possible. Yet those who are so very open about it seem to have adopted an almost sense of entitlement, as though their illness is a badge of honour and achievement for their past and those without such illness have obviously not struggled and suffered as they have... which sadly also breeds resentment, misunderstanding and avoidance on the part of those who may feel overwhelmed and bombarded by the sufferer's intensity.

I guess I say all that to say that striking the balance for each individual seems to be the ultimate challenge - one I certainly struggle with. I do see a consistent theme coming through in many of your responses which I do believe is true, that being that in order to dispel the stigmas and increase the flow of accurate information, the emphasis in disclosing/sharing should be on "what happened to you" as opposed to "what is wrong with you". This is a subtle, yet very critical, shift in focus, and one which I think can go a long way towards diminishing some of the stigma that is held both by sufferers and the general community about mental illness.

Maddog

 

[Springer80]

This is exactly what happened to my sister

I'm Sorry. :cry:

 

[Springer80]

You know, I think perhaps (hopefully) sufferers get to a point where their lives have adapted enough (choice or obligation) that you can stop fighting it and build something around it. Maybe once that starts you don't worry or care so much about explanations because you can manage it better. Personally, I struggle with having always wanted to create nicer environments where ever I go. I suppose I was moulded into a bit of an observer/rescuer type and it's hard trying to stop that compulsion.

 

[BigBear]

Well I guess I am one of the exceptions to the norm ...

My personal experiences have been similar to yours, Nicolette. I think a lot of supporters might come out with a much different slant.

On the other hand, I think it is completely valid to say that a large segment of society can't be bothered with people who have problem. I just don't feel good pretending that all of society is the same...

Bear

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I was at a outside dinner party this last Friday night, where I took Xanax before I went knowing there are going to be big crowds and requirements of talking to people.

The host is an MD and is a mentor to my H. The host knows I have PTSD, bipolar disorder, and social aneixty. And when we arrived told me that if I needed too I could go into his house where there will not be many people to calm my anxiety.

Many hours later and towards the end of the party we met the host again. There were a few other people around us but the host asked how I was enjoying the party. I laughed and said "Great! But my Xanax is wearing off!" He laughed and laughed. But it was also my some what subtle way of telling him that I needed to leave because I was starting to reach my limit.

My H made a good choice in telling this person. He often will ask my H genuinely how I am doing and my H as asked him for advice a few times. This same person always makes a point at his dinner parties to let me know that if I need to leave he will understand and not be offended.

I felt comfortable enough with myself and my own life that I made that joke in front of others. I did not care that later my H pointed out that those people had probably been doctors and understood me.

Of course I would not have made references to my more serious problems.

I do believe that their is a lot of stigma. That has been proven in research. However I do believe that there are ways of overcoming it. Through education, knowledge and even humor.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I believe it comes back to that ingrain aspect of what can be seen versus what cannot. Unless you experience mental illness, you cannot understand it, IMHO.

I completely completely agree with this.

There is stigma in the medical community as well. You would think that with medical knowledge that more doctors, nurses and aids would be more understanding. However when I was hospitalized twice I found this was not always true. I believe that a lot of it comes for not understanding what they are dealing with. They see a mentally ill person and fall for that stigma that the person just needs to pull themselves together.

I hope I am not over generalizing.

My T used to be an alcoholic and he is not shameful and will freely tell people that he goes to AA meeting and has for years. I have often felt that this helps him understand other people better. He is able to relate to his clients better then any T I have ever had.

 

[maddog]

Totally agree with everything Ayesha said in her last two posts. There is indeed just as much stigma and misunderstanding in the mental health community as in the general one. Perhaps it seems more obnoxious and less acceptable too, given that we really do have a right to expect better... but then again, medical professionals are just people too, and lots of people aren't really that good at their jobs, right?

Also totally agree that when carefully considered and chosen for the right context, humour can be an excellent ice breaker and normaliser, just as in all aspects of life. Humour puts people at ease, breaks down barriers and gives everyone common footing and a place to relate. Yes, you do need to be very careful not to sacrifice yourself and your right to respect and dignity in the process, but when it works, it really works.

A recent example is that I am currently sharing an office with another guy at work who is on a rehab plan due to mental health issues. Having gotten to know both he and our temporary supervisor a little better and judged that the context was right, I suggested they designate our office as the "psych ward" and be done with it.

Everyone laughed. It worked. Somehow, in some small way, it helped to ease the tension.

Maddog

 

[Zef]

In some ways, I think society is more understanding of PTSD than it is of other brain-based illnesses. Yes, there are stereotypes and lots of ignorant or insensitive people, but, primarily for combat-related PTSD, there seems to be a current of support.

My example, I'm very open about the PTSD part of my diagnosis. My workmates know, my acquaintances know and I'm able to joke about it most of the time. I've been lucky in that I have found people mostly supportive.

On the other hand, the DDNOS part of my diagnosis, almost no one knows about. My wife knows as much as I can describe and I've been a little open about it on this forum. I think this is for a couple of reasons; I think it would scare the hell out of people which would negatively impact my life and because I haven't come up with any way to describe it so that people wouldn't freak out.

 

[maddog]

Totally agree with you Zef that dissociative disorders carry a very unique brand of fear and resulting ostracism within the community... even within the mental health community the stigma and rejection is particularly alive and well. Yes, it's hard to find a gentle or mundane way to describe dissociation, because by its very nature it implies a degree of being detached from reality, and straight away people have visions of psychotic and irrational behaviour or of people "possessed".

The fact that in my own opinion and experience, certain arms of the mental health community are very quick and somewhat careless to diagnose dissociative disorders, doesn't help to promote a realistic understanding of them. Some clinicians want to smack a dissociative label on you the first time they hear you've had a flashback or felt emotionally numb, whereas others would seemingly prefer to ignore evidence of alters and significant personality fragmentation which don't have such an obvious medication regiment that can be attached for easy treatment.

Not sure when I got this cynical about the world (and the mental health community in general)...

MD

 

[intothelight]

Maddog, I really liked your observation about the extremes of revealing PTSD, and the need for balance. I see most people keeping information to themselves out of fear, and most of the time it is very justified. Your statement above about the mental health community not being very understanding of disassociate disorders is a case in point.

The only people who I have ever met that are immediately open about a mental disorder are those that use it as an excuse to justify bad behavior or as a means to manipulate. Sad thing is, I feel they represent the minority, but get portrayed as the majority.

I think the comment that it takes having a mental illness to understand it is true to some degree. But I believe that depression, anxiety, feelings of worthlessness; and yes, even suicidal ideation are not uncommon experiences for most people. I find that when I am explaining PTSD, I can take some of those examples, find common ground, and explain that it is the degree and length that is different.

The lack of knowledge and understanding is huge; and people tend to fear what they do not know or understand. I will never be one to reveal anything so personal just to any one, but I will be more open and sharing when the appropriate opportunity arises. I am finding myself confronted with these opportunities and I hope that I can overcome my own "shame" and share in the spirit of acceptance and understanding.

 

[Lionheart]

I've noticed that PTSD patients being considered for medical marijuana are mainly veterans, but nothing is said of the other types of trauma that can cause PTSD. Recently someone asked my sister how I could have PTSD since I was not a veteran. She explained that lots of things can cause trauma besides war alone. It makes me wonder what kind of information is available to the general public as they seem to latch onto the idea of 'shell-shock', but not so much the other types of trauma. Don't get me wrong, vets need to be recognized, but so do people who suffer from other types of trauma.

Child abuse does not get swept under the rug as much as it used to, I don't think, but it is still not something people tend to want to discuss....at least not in my experience.:confused: I think this forum increases awareness for society and that's very important and desperately needed, imho.

 

[piratelady]

I was watching one of those crime solving murder shows last night and the comment on the show was something to the effect of "I can't believe he killed all those people, it must be PTSD!"... I see PTSD thrown around a lot of TV shows now. Either as a person who committed some awful crime or their crazy and some therapist is going to wave their magic wand and fix them. I think the spin TV shows put on PTSD negatively colors society's view of it. I mean, people should know they can't learn about people with PTSD from TV, but it still affects their perception.