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Stuck emotion

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Hopeforlife

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I saw my therapist yesterday. I have been doing EMDR and been in a really bad place these past few weeks. I feel like I am sitting on the edge and I could just cry at any second. But I feel like I am sort of controlling it and holding it in. If I could describe it it’s like a massive ball of emotion that starts to move a little when I feel like I need to cry but it comes up so far but I can never release it. It’s so painful. How can I release this? I feel that if I have a good cry maybe that will sort me out but I feel blocked!
 
@EveHarrington thank you. I am avoiding things that will make me cry too. Like today the radio was on in work and a very special song came on and normally I take a minute or two to reflect but I went to the office and closed the door before I even realised what I had done. I have this idea that if I punish myself or push myself to breaking point that it will come out but I will be out of control and I certainly don’t want that to happen. I’m exhausted...

I was looking at the notebook or city of angels earlier but I couldn’t do it!
 
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But it could be incredibly cathartic and you could come out on the other side feeling so much better. This is why I don’t stop my emotional flashbacks much of the time. Going through them sucks but the aftermath feels sooooo good.
 
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