Stupid Commerical

[Misul]

I rarely watch TV, but I saw a commercial for bug spray that made out ants to be the #1 enemy of your children.

Now I can't stop thinking about when I had to sleep when ants were crawling everywhere. They were all over my bed, hundreds of them because their nest was right by my bedroom window, and my mom wouldn't do anything to kill them. I don't remember how old I was, but I was a kid. This is how I lived. I just want to forget everything forever.

I don't know what to do in moments like this except go to my make-believe world. Am I going to have to keep running forever?

 

[franciemarnie]

I'm so sorry you had to live like that when you were growing up. That was awful. Just awful.

And then you see that commercial.

It is a great thing to have a safe place to go to, if that is what you mean by make believe world. It is not just that we had to live thru such terrible experiences that it was necessary to make up a place of comfort because there wasn't any we could find in the real world. But if you have that place inside, it's a good thing for moments like these.

I hope you find comfort tonight. Sending healing light and warmth if okay.

 

[Misul]

Franciemarine ,

It really means a lot to hear someone say that the way I lived was awful. Do you know that most people either defend my abusers or say things like, "everyone had bad childhoods."

Someone I dated later on had ants in his bathroom and thought it was okay to make me bathe there. There were dead ones in the water. I was so terrified that I actually boarded a plane the next day to to get away from him.

I'm glad I didn't develop a phobia of ants.

Thank you for your reply. It means so much.

Misul

 

[mamachick]

I understand. I grew up in a house with cockroaches. My mother hated them and tried to rid of them always spraying DDT. Eventually she had to hire an exterminator. She was tight with her money-didnt buy toilet paper so Im sure I had the comics on my rectum first time examined.

Anyway, at night if you would go and turn on kitchen light, they ran everywhere. Open a cabinet and they ran across the dishes, open the medicine cabinet and they ran. It was awful. When I was 5-7, I got an infected earlobe. It was all pussy and had to put peroxide on it daily. I had to go to Dr and get anti biotics as it was infected. My older sister (of 7 yrs) told me the roaches were eating my flesh while I slept. I was scared of them.

I started finding these bugs in my kitchen a couple weeks ago and freaked. I dont have money for exterminator. I sprayed and some died, but they kept appearing. They turned out to be earwigs. It was a huge relief. It had set me into a panic state. My stress cup is already full.

 

[franciemarnie]

How dare people defend your abusers. How dare they. They are sick (expletive)'s! And everyone had bad childhoods? Ha! Oh man, people just kill me sometimes.

I am so glad you left that person with the unsanitary conditions. That made me feel happy that you got the heck out!

 

[Misul]

For me it's frightening, not because of the insects, but because people could have stopped it but didn't. That seems so dark to me. These types of things are very disturbing to me.