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DID T thinks i have did?

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@PTSDbegone my T said a similar thing last week, that she can help me with integration if this is the case. The more I sit and read, the more I agree with T, but on the flip-side I do get more scared/nervous. I see T tomorrow though, so I have lots of questions for her about what I read in the book she gave me.

@Born to Run I don't think I'm familiar enough with DID to understand what you mean. I thought DID was entirely separate from other dissociative disorders. I know we all fall on a dissociative spectrum, because everyone dissociates at some time, even non-traumatized people.
 
In the past MPD was an entirely separate category, but not anymore since it is called DID.

From Wikipedia:

"Dissociative identity disorder (DID), previously known as multiple personality disorder (MPD),[1] is a mental disorder on the dissociative spectrum characterized by at least two distinct and relatively enduring identities or dissociated personality states that alternately control a person's behavior, and is accompanied by memory impairment for important information not explained by ordinary forgetfulness." Source 1: "The ICD-10 Classification of Mental and Behavioural Disorders" (PDF). World Health Organization.

About the selection in cursive above; you have distinct identities, while I have personality states, and many others here. The psychological dynamic is the same for both, we fragment or split off parts of ourselves to contain the pain separate from us, so we can keep functioning. I have often felt in therapy to be so close to a different identity, so it is can be easy for people with the non full blown DID to feel into what that is like.
 
@PTSDbegone I had my session with T yesterday. We talked quite a bit about DID, my fears about it, she helped me with my safe place thing. Hard to describe without writing out the whole thing, but essentially it's a safe place (written in the book she gave me) that no one can come into unless I invite them, and there is a place to store memories that I'm not ready to work on yet if they come up.

T said something yesterday that made me tear up, not sure why it did, but she said that when she (T) is talking that all parts can hear her. I don't know, it doesn't seem fair that they can hear everything and I can't, that I get left in the dark. Also when T was installing the safe place with me Little and I started to bicker back and forth in my head; that made me feeling bat sh*t crazy. Little wanted to come out and talk to T, but I kept telling her no. There were a lot of reasons I didn't want Little to come out and talk, one being that I really needed to install this safe place, I know it's important for me to do my work and have it, also, T and I hadn't established any ground rules in case a part came out to talk. I didn't know what T would do, I didn't know if she would tell me, I didn't know if she would share what was said. It was scary, so I yelled at Little to stay put.

T also said yesterday that she is open to talking to any parts that come out, as long as it is ok with the core. I didn't tell T about the bickering with Little while I was in session with her because right after we finished the safe place time was up. I emailed her late last night and mentioned it, but I also told her my fears behind letting Little come out, or any part coming out on their own for that matter. I asked her if she would tell me, I asked what she would do, I asked if she would share what was said.

Hoping she gets back to me today because it's consuming my thoughts right now, and I would really like to study for my next midterm that's on Monday.
 
Oh and also I had a dream(?) last night that someone burnt my safe place down... well it was the entire protected meadow/house/vault for memories that was lit on fire, completely torched.
 
@greenleaf that's a tough one for me, I'm not very kind to Little. I haven't connected with any other parts, I don't "feel" them the same way I feel Little, I just feel like a stirring happening in me - like a mini tornado. So I'm not harsh with any others. But I am very critical of Little, very mean sometimes (more often then not). It's a learning process.
 
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